The Official Relationship, Dating, or Talking Problems/Questions Thread

Dec 08, 2012 @ 06:06
Dec 08, 2012 @ 06:14
Originally posted by Inactive User
just hit her up a few hours ago, to find out she converted to islam, she was always a cool chick the one ex i was really in love with. but her religion states cant date only marry. i never knew how much i cared for her, i want her but cant have her, idk if i can be around her and stay sane what to do? i really still like this girl.  
really just converted...could be front tho. i unno these broads be actin up.let her go man. u got game. dont let this situ thinking u cant get another broad

edit.

but if she did really convert to islam. relationship could be very classical. in the sense of family life and shit like in the future. man has alot of juice in islamic relationships from what i noticed. could be ideal life. she will be loyal, honest, not a cheater, cook take care of kids, cleaning etc. hopefully american culture hasnt destroyed her. 

17000 ferrari

Dec 08, 2012 @ 06:30
no bruh she really converted she was always a lover of the islam religion but she finally converted, so it real shit, she wears the hijab and all. but i would have to marry her like marry, no dating. im only 20. like damn we we were talking for a good 4hours. to be honest i have fam that are muslim and almost converted last summer but held off, but damn idk.

:)

Dec 08, 2012 @ 06:40
Originally posted by Inactive User
no bruh she really converted she was always a lover of the islam religion but she finally converted, so it real shit, she wears the hijab and all. but i would have to marry her like marry, no dating. im only 20. like damn we we were talking for a good 4hours. to be honest i have fam that are muslim and almost converted last summer but held off, but damn idk.
IMO you are way to young to have to make a decision like that. have u gotten to do you at the ripe age of 20. travel your hobbies, school, living life etc.... 

not saying u cant do all that stuff with ur girl and fam. but their might be pressure from their fam for children. so once kids get involved could get messy. you will prolly wanna be a good dad and all. party life ends. commitments pile up

wat if in like 2 yrs or more u get tired of marriage. and then its too late to enjoi life.

we in our prime i say explore more.did she grow up in an islamic household btw ? 

also has she had men before converting ?

17000 ferrari

Dec 08, 2012 @ 06:54
i see what your saying. i do feel like im slightly too young to make such a change but i really do love this girl. 

and about kids i doubt she wants kids now, she is 21 still in college, we're both in college. 

that is a good point idk if i will feel the same way about her in so in so years but right now i feel like she is my yoke not yet equaled.

no she grew up in a christian household, she has been studying islam for about 3-4 years.

she has been with 4 men total including me before conversion. 

:)

Dec 08, 2012 @ 07:20
aight so shes seems dedicated to the religion. however some girls. that I know of. not saying yours did this.

convert to try and cleanse them selves of past "sins" ie sex, drugs etc. religion keeps them on that good path. she may have already lived out wat she thought she wanted. she may be an adrenaline junkie.

so young doubt that in this case. but there are some wild girls out there  so she wants to settle down and live a pretty tame life she lived out her wild side.

but if the right opportunity arises some women will dip the fam if better prospects arise.

in this day an age finding the one is rare. and the numbers dont lie (divorce) even in muslim relationships this number is going up. 

17000 ferrari

dmwalking
Dec 08, 2012 @ 21:10
Jacob, she cares about you. You care about her. But if you ain't ready for marriage, you ain't ready.  And if you ain't ready to commit to that religion or at least enable her to feel fulfilled in that religion, you ain't ready.  Do your thing until you're ready.   I remember "loving" this one chick man. I had it bad for her. She was my perfect type. But we grew apart.  That girl I fell in love with at 22 wasn't the same girl I wanted to be with when I got older.  Give it time.  You'll be aight. 

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Dec 08, 2012 @ 23:48
yeah im not even close to ready.ill just be her friend for now i guess.if i decide to make a decision in the future ill be the right one during the right timelike my guru told me; "If you must bow toward Mecca, bow toward Mecca. Bowing is good practice."

thanks for the help domingodean and dmwalking. 

:)

Dec 12, 2012 @ 02:01
Who else has a girlfriend like this. She would rather have me come over and hang and talk to her all day instead of wine and dine. She says she just enjoys my company and talking to me. She feels extremely comfortable with me and has told me a lot.
It was strange at first because I was so use to going out and doing stuff. I pay for most things but sometimes she pays for me.
Dec 12, 2012 @ 02:02
Originally posted by Inactive User
Who else has a girlfriend like this. She would rather have me come over and hang and talk to her all day instead of wine and dine. She says she just enjoys my company and talking to me. She feels extremely comfortable with me and has told me a lot.

It was strange at first because I was so use to going out and doing stuff. I pay for most things but sometimes she pays for me.

That's a keeper.

......

Dec 12, 2012 @ 02:02
Shit that's dope..

less money you have to spend 
dmwalking
Dec 12, 2012 @ 02:52
Originally posted by Inactive User
Who else has a girlfriend like this. She would rather have me come over and hang and talk to her all day instead of wine and dine. She says she just enjoys my company and talking to me. She feels extremely comfortable with me and has told me a lot.

It was strange at first because I was so use to going out and doing stuff. I pay for most things but sometimes she pays for me.
Me.  Keep. 

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Dec 12, 2012 @ 02:57
Originally posted by Inactive User
Who else has a girlfriend like this. She would rather have me come over and hang and talk to her all day instead of wine and dine. She says she just enjoys my company and talking to me. She feels extremely comfortable with me and has told me a lot.

It was strange at first because I was so use to going out and doing stuff. I pay for most things but sometimes she pays for me.
yes bruh that is the best, you are very lucky! keep her around but also surprise her from time to time with places to go like the park movies or some place where the two of you can still enjoy each others company. 

:)

Dec 12, 2012 @ 03:15
@Jacob yes I do. I take her out whenever she is in the mood. She's Mexican and I'm African American. Her parents are cool but barely speak English lol. I try to give her flowers or take her out at times.
Dec 12, 2012 @ 03:29
Originally posted by Inactive User
Who else has a girlfriend like this. She would rather have me come over and hang and talk to her all day instead of wine and dine. She says she just enjoys my company and talking to me. She feels extremely comfortable with me and has told me a lot.

It was strange at first because I was so use to going out and doing stuff. I pay for most things but sometimes she pays for me.
I had that, it's awesome, keep it as long as you can.

I had to end mine 2 months ago sadly because my ex was emotionally too much to handle and it let to constant arguing and I didn't want that to continue anymore.

And now I found out she's dating some dude, and now I have another reason to miss her because i know that i dont have her, which I know is wrong reason to miss someone. 

Should I act on this added feeling of missing her or just ignore it like i have been for the past 2 months? I just don't know how to go about it
Dec 12, 2012 @ 03:33
Naw nigga don't act on it, y'all broke up for a reason, find someone better 
Dec 12, 2012 @ 03:53
Yeah if you constantly argued then I wouldn't. Me and my girl really communicate. I tell her if something bothers me and why. She does the same. I try to listen and improve. Also she is sometimes passive and I am understanding.
Dec 12, 2012 @ 04:35
Adam i believe in the saying "let it go and if it comes back to you it was truly yours to begin with". i know its hard to sit back and know she is living on without you but give it time and heal and become more in touch with yourself. i did this and im now talking to my ex that i haven't talked to in 8months and we are really kicking it off and happy with each others return, just wait and if she comes back be thankful, if not you will find another. 

:)

Dec 12, 2012 @ 04:50
@adam5

me personally dont have time for that crap. 
by "emotionally too much to handle" you talking bout drama and other bull shit ?
u gotta move on b. she just a chick. ur gonna find a new one. they really aint nothing to fret about.
good on you for breaking it off. she was draining your energy and emotions. that shit tends to leads to break ups
side note I try not to communicate with my exs at all.

17000 ferrari

Dec 12, 2012 @ 04:57
The Official Weak And Beta Male Thread
Dec 12, 2012 @ 05:01
^bitch you got aids and cancer shutup. 

:)

Dec 12, 2012 @ 05:28
@domingodean Yeah, overly sensitive, drama bullshit, etc. 

And the arguing did drain a lot out of me, and since I'm a college student athlete I feel at times the arguing would drain me and take away from both sports and school, and i'm trying to do something special with both and focus on trying to get a scholarship somewhere, and that's what led to my decision to break up with her.

I officially broke up with her last june for some bullshit and then august-october was spent talking on and off, so we've had problems for a while. But I officially called it quits in october and haven't talked to her since. 

Shit was tough because she really was a best friend, along with being a girlfriend, and I guess that's why I still reminisce over things that lead me to miss her, and the new guy she went on a date with made things worse for me.

Like i've hooked up with/fucked/gone on dates with a couple girls since i called it off, but none of them I really want to get serious with. But if i could find a girl that could fill that void who's cool then I'd be good with that, but im having trouble letting myself be able to get to that point of openness, since i miss her and all, but i guess with time that'll change. 

@jacob i could see myself with her again once i'm at point in my life where i am a little more situated than i am now, but i guess waiting for that wouldn't be ideal, so i should just look for someone new in the meantime.

I appreciate all the feedback guys, you all have really given me some new outlooks on my situation.
Dec 12, 2012 @ 12:58
Originally posted by Inactive User
Originally posted by Inactive User
Who else has a girlfriend like this. She would rather have me come over and hang and talk to her all day instead of wine and dine. She says she just enjoys my company and talking to me. She feels extremely comfortable with me and has told me a lot.


It was strange at first because I was so use to going out and doing stuff. I pay for most things but sometimes she pays for me.
Me.  Keep. 
Keeper! Do not fuck up man. 
Dec 12, 2012 @ 20:40
Who else overthinks in a relationship? 
Dec 12, 2012 @ 21:05
Any of you hb niggas get an ex back after you "broke her heart," because I still like my ex but she said I broke her heart c'mon son 
Dec 12, 2012 @ 21:07
@brick How bad did you break it?
Dec 12, 2012 @ 21:20
@brick How bad did you break it?
 It must not be too broke because I came back to school after a month of absence & she said when she saw me, her heart sank ? & she actually replies to me now lol
Dec 12, 2012 @ 22:32
There is probably a chance then if you get to hag with her again. 
Dec 12, 2012 @ 23:26
Who else overthinks in a relationship? 

I do all the time. I been dating my girl for three years, shes 22 im 21. When your this young theres always the allure of single life, and I stay overanalysing this and that. I catch myself getting hung up on the littlest shit that doesn't matter. But my woman is a keeper, shes compassionate and never makes moves without considering how she might affect others, yet never lets anyone walk on her, always stands her ground and is incredibly brave, the most honest person i've ever known, shes funny too, classy in the streets a freak in the sheets, white girl with latina T and A steez. She doesn't gossip like other women do, or fuck around on some petty bullshit. Shes real peaceful. Honestly shes more grown than me, and shes helped me be a better person.  She plays her role and lets me be the man and get what I want, yet shes very independent. Shes loaded in the bank off her own hard work, and she pays for us just as me. Shes incredible in the fact that she has almost none of the typical flaws, but of course shes still fucked in some ways like the rest of us lol. Anxiety, can be a problem for her, and im not down with some of her fundemental values, we work around it but when it causes issues I over think compatibility, on some unrealistic shit. Still I find shit to get hung up on, over the summer she agained about 30lbs on some medication she was taking, which is a lot for a girl her size. It fucked shit up for a moment, I like slim girls with a little thickness but she surpassed the amount of thickness I was attracted too. It put me in a mind fuck because even though she was the shit on paper, I knew if I had just met her and she looked like that I wouldn't have been down, but she went through a hard time on these meds on the other hand I felt like I should help her through that. The lack of attraction fucked shit up she could tell I wasn't feelin it and her self esteem went down the drain. Shes resilliant though, if she slips she gets back up, and I figured she was mature enough to understand how her weight gain affected me, and I had faith she would get to gettin back in shape on her own time when she was ready. Shes not the type to let my expectations control her so my opinion on her body is a mute point. Part of me felt like if she wasn't ready to stop her meds right away and hit the gym all day for me I had to leave her on some alpha male shit, like I have to be in control and have it my way, but really I came too see that'd be some insecure immature shit, mistaken in the form of foolish pride. I'm so glad I stuck with her, now shes training to teach yoga in manhattan and has dropped mad weight dieting. Shes all about that healthy lifestyle and looks great again. Shit never gets old or dull with her through thick and thin I only get more into what we have as we both grow, but were also young I am well aware we could grow apart on the other hand.


My point to you is, when you really been with someone and had a real connection, like you know them to the core, focus on their essence, their inevitable truths, and you can see through some petty bullshit and all the shit you been overthinking becomes clear. As long as you can have moments of clarity, trust in those, and if you don't have em, don't deal with that female. If your woman knows exactly who she is, her actions in the past and her true nature will shed much light on how shes thinking in the moment or where you might be going in the future. You gotta stay true as fuck to yourself too, its a two way st.

hope this shit is useful to someone
Dec 12, 2012 @ 23:38
@kbos I know exactly what you mean. Thanks for your input. It is truly appreciated. I was under a lot of stress recently and really was overthinking. After I look back at it now and see how worthless all that was. It really just messed up my mind. I have had moments of clarity recently. I am truly happy with my woman and know we have a bright future. She tells me the same. 
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