July 15, 2010 at 14:17:15 Jul 15, 2010 @ 14:17
i don't understand which part of that was racist.
Im really bad at telling stories so this might not seem as funny as it actually was
so... back in high school me and my friends were just relaxing at their house and i suddenly had the urge to drop a deuce so i left (only live accross the street) after i handled my business i came back to find that my two friends are sitting on the couch watching porn in the living room together one is eating a hot link and the two other were comparing pubes... I walk in and i'm all "what the fuck is going on" and it was like literally a minute of silence with moans and groans from the tv and everyone just looking at one another... then i just left... talk about homo-ishly awkward
wacking off stories:
alright one time im jacking off in my room and i hear my dad stomping in so i close everything hella quick and rush to the door. he sees me pull up my pants hella quick. everythings safe i guess. so he tells me someones calling me (before i had a cell) and just throws the fuckign phone on my hands, and our hands meet. Little did i know my hands still had skeet and it gets on his hand. i sit down and talk and at the corner of my eye i see him smell his hand and jump back. i dont look at him and we stand there awkardly for 5 min because of the phone call (forgot what it was, i think 24fitness, something that required him to be there). yeah then he left and wasnt in the house, no idea where he went for the rest of the day.
another time im wacking off as im dead in gta4 in a online match on my comp, and i skeet and it flies and i go "wow another cieling bullshit" (this was about a couple months later) anyways i cant find where the fucking skeet is i looked everywhere. this is back when i had long hair. so i walked around the house doing my shit and then i go to take a shower later and the skeet was fucking on the right side of my hair....... fuck dud
Originally posted by Inactive Userso im at my homies house waiting for him to get ready so we can leave. i just met his mom for the first time and we are talking. this ✖✖✖✖✖ is taking all day for some reason so i take my jacket off and out pops a swisher sweet (im 17 and he is 16) she goes to reach for it and i throw my jacket over it as shes bending down to get it. now we are both jus looking at the coat and i proceed to pick up my jacket n put the swisher back into my pocket like nothing happened.
Originally posted by Inactive User2nd grade. While my teacher is writing on the board, I make guns outta my fingers and pretend to shoot her. Someone tells on me and I get detention.
^LOL. I have a story similar to that.
One time me and my mom and brother went to go get ihop for breakfast, then we were about to pull out of the driveway. Anyway there was a cop giving a ticket so as we were about to pass him, I took out an imaginary shot gun and was blaasting him. i was going CHH CHH BOOM CHH CHH BOOM. he turns around and im like in my head, ALRIGHT MOM BLAST OFF. but we can't turn out beacuse of traffic. We just stare at each other for like 20 seconds.