look. that's fine ^^^^ i sympathize. but to bring those that dont understand in u need to identify as something even if that something has branches underneath it. regular gay people did not come up w/ seventy definitions of what they are, gay male, gay female. that is a concept people can understand. you may feel like a woman mentally, but you are not physically. yes plumbing does matter, otherwise y b gay in the first place or have surgeries or have sex with different genders? so to you it does matter and a person like me knows this because i have eyes and a brain. i see you saying two or three or four different things. that makes no sense, especially at first. remember your average stranger does not know you, and as a first introduction a lengthy diatribe just does not do.
when u try and tell me it doesnt matter one minute, then try and assert your right to do it your way the next, you come across as confused, flaky and full of shit. you cant have it both ways if you want people to take you seriously. it's like saying "oh im a cow today, but tomorrow i may be a horse." be proud of what you are and fight for what you are, you are transgendered. male to female or female to male. dude, i get that, im not that myself, but its a concept normal straight people can understand. it is what you are. if there are other components fine, as you get to know folk explain that, fine.
but just be transgendered, for those with more to it explain that when you get to know people. there's different kinds of gay, but they identify as gay for political purposes, then as they get to know people, if its appropriate according to them, they expand on it. people now respect the label "gay" because they stood on it and fought for it. women have their own struggles as people born women. it is unfair and insulting to their struggles that they are still going through. it matters to straight men too. that might seem a little hurtful to hear at first, but it is true and necessary. you want us to respect you, fine, but respect us too. we matter too.
it does make a difference to an extent and an extent that matters. gays stood on gay and won because they repeated the word and finally folks said, "okay i get it you're gay." do the same as transgendered. black people or asian people start with that. just black or asian. then as they get to know people if there's more to it they go further or as appropriate.
just be honest and straightforward. male to female or female to male transgendered. fine. stand there and fight from there until people say, "okay, okay i get it, you're transgendered." the reason i say this is that words matter, especially in politics. you may not like hearing it, but reality is not disneyland, its harsh cruel, cold and unfriendly especially strangers and those that do not know you. afte rall that is what these fights are about getting strangers to respect your rights. thats politics and politics itself is a brutal sewer, believe me. keep it simple. black, gay, disabled, latino, citizen, immigrant, christian, muslim, etc. short sweet simple with concepts we get.