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The Official Relationship, Dating, or Talking Problems/Questions Thread

Sep 30, 2012 @ 07:54
Finally found a good thread.
My 2 year 5 month relationship ended, how do I cope with things when I put everything else on the side just for her? Feels like I lost everything when I feel I made her my everything?! </3


No matter what you do it's gonna bother you for a while, but with time you'll stop giving a fuck. That's guaranteed. The only temporary solutions is to get lots of excess money, get intoxicated, or get pussy

@b_low_brown Killerbrownies.tumblr.com

Sep 30, 2012 @ 07:55
Finally found a good thread.
My 2 year 5 month relationship ended, how do I cope with things when I put everything else on the side just for her? Feels like I lost everything when I feel I made her my everything?! </3


advice, go to a club, get fucked up and hit on as many girls as possible. if you get a girl, take her home and if even that it doesn't change your mind then idk dude.
The thing is, I ain't about that life. Even if I tried, I wouldn't be in the mental state to actually go with it and shit.

muhstakes.tumblr.com | IG: muhstvkes

Sep 30, 2012 @ 08:16
advice, go to a club, get fucked up and hit on as many girls as possible. if you get a girl, take her home and if even that it doesn't change your mind then idk dude.
The thing is, I ain't about that life. Even if I tried, I wouldn't be in the mental state to actually go with it and shit.

You got other priorities now.
Easier said than done, I know.. but just gotta stop thinking about her.
The best way is to occupy your mind.
Work, join sports teams, join clubs if you're at school, do other shit.

some wisdom too, lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYfxNyOIS-I
Sep 30, 2012 @ 08:21
The thing is, I ain't about that life. Even if I tried, I wouldn't be in the mental state to actually go with it and shit.

You got other priorities now.
Easier said than done, I know.. but just gotta stop thinking about her.
The best way is to occupy your mind.
Work, join sports teams, join clubs if you're at school, do other shit.

some wisdom too, lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYfxNyOIS-I
Thanks for the advice, I've been in my baseball team for a while, thoughts only seem to go away when I have practice and stuff. I guess I gotta find something to do in the little gaps of time that get me reminding myself. Thanks.

muhstakes.tumblr.com | IG: muhstvkes

dmwalking
Oct 10, 2012 @ 21:09
Don't get emotionally invested. The truth is, once a cheater, always a cheater unless they've had a major psychological break through. It's just something you have to accept. Unless you're willing to accept that and take it on the chin, don't get emotionally invested. Everything's good NOW. And I believe you're right on the money that she's back with you because there's nothing else. But ask yourself: why did she cheat before? Because at that moment, there was something else. She's using you as a hold over. Cheaters are opportunists. When a better opportunity comes, they're jumping on it.

Option A: keep her around selfishly. It's nice to have a female around to do things for you.

Option B: Keep it as friends only.

Option C: Friends with benefits (not recommended. 9/10 it always gets complicated)

Option D: Get cheated on again.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Oct 10, 2012 @ 21:19
Don't get emotionally invested. The truth is, once a cheater, always a cheater unless they've had a major psychological break through. It's just something you have to accept. Unless you're willing to accept that and take it on the chin, don't get emotionally invested. Everything's good NOW. And I believe you're right on the money that she's back with you because there's nothing else. But ask yourself: why did she cheat before? Because at that moment, there was something else. She's using you as a hold over. Cheaters are opportunists. When a better opportunity comes, they're jumping on it.

Option A: keep her around selfishly. It's nice to have a female around to do things for you.

Option B: Keep it as friends only.

Option C: Friends with benefits (not recommended. 9/10 it always gets complicated)

Option D: Get cheated on again.


How did you become so wise DM?

Chicks barely dancin, glancin every chance they get, like - oh shit, he's so HANSUM

dmwalking
Oct 10, 2012 @ 22:20
How did you become so wise DM?


Lots of experience. Lots of observation. You'd be surprised how much you can learn just from watching other people. But I don't know as much as it seems. If this was an entrepreneureal forum full of 50 something white millionaires, I'd be lost. I'm just an old nigga on a young site so I just been there, done that, or seen it. The rest I'm still working on figuring out. In the meantime, I don't mind dropping some helpful info to help dudes avoid problems.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Oct 10, 2012 @ 22:31
Met a chick at a university when i was visiting one of my buddies. We were just eatin and her and her friend kept glancing at me every few minutes. I know somthins up but i don't pursue so im just like whatever. She ends up givin her number to my buddy and told him to give i to me. Text her for a few weeks. Go back down there again. Go to her room to chill. She asked mad fucking questions, just random and personal shit. In my head i was like "bitch shutup, lets bang" I was zoning out and eventually bounced cuz my penis went soft from all the questions. Texted her later on and she ends up saying sex aint that important to her and she wont do it with anybody. I didnt text her back. I mean she's cute but i'm just trying to bang, no relationships. Now that other chick that was checkin me out i heard was more down for sex aka slut so i'd be down for that shit.don't know if i can make the switch though. probably because shes a slut though.. I'm quite bored so i' thought i'd share and open to any advice or whatever
dmwalking
Oct 10, 2012 @ 22:43
I think it's funny when niggas answer their own questions in their rants. Like you already stating you don't want the lame shorty you just wanna bone so you want the slut. LOL. You just looking for affirmation.

But real talk, avoid mrs "sex ain't important to me." She's one of those chicks who try to preserve dignity when you're doing the deed. All those questions were more of an interrogation, too. She wants a relationship. Or rather, she wants a lap dog. She's likely argumentative and controlling too. Run. I wouldn't advise messing with the slut either cuz that's gonna drop your penis stock with the quality chicks. Like, if girls know you banging slores, they're gonna think less of you. They're trying to maintain their vagina value. Ain't no way for her to keep her stock high if she gets smashed by a dude who smashes slores. Stick to quality and quality will follow.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Oct 10, 2012 @ 23:00
dm in here

hndlz.tumblr.com

Oct 10, 2012 @ 23:04
Mr. DM

I need some knowledge.

Like you said, avoid those girls who just act as if they have "dignity".

But what about the girls (these are ultra-rare. I know. It's like finding a mewtwo) that actually HAVE dignity and respect cause they were raised up right. How can you tell the difference?
Oct 11, 2012 @ 01:48
Originally posted by Inactive User
Mr. DM

I need some knowledge.

Like you said, avoid those girls who just act as if they have "dignity".

But what about the girls (these are ultra-rare. I know. It's like finding a mewtwo) that actually HAVE dignity and respect cause they were raised up right. How can you tell the difference?


if they rich?
Oct 11, 2012 @ 02:14
..........
dmwalking
Oct 11, 2012 @ 03:38
Originally posted by Inactive User
Mr. DM

I need some knowledge.

Like you said, avoid those girls who just act as if they have "dignity".

But what about the girls (these are ultra-rare. I know. It's like finding a mewtwo) that actually HAVE dignity and respect cause they were raised up right. How can you tell the difference?


If they have authentic dignity, they'll have no need to preserve dignity in the bedroom. How can I tell the difference? Body language. If a girl is a cold fish, they'll be lame. If a girl composes herself with class, but when she's alone with you opens up, then you have a winner. It may take some effort on your part, but that's because they wanna open up to the right guy. But it'll be worth it if you care.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

dmwalking
Oct 11, 2012 @ 03:50
maybe I'm jaded bcuz I live in a big city like Toronto but this shit does not happen frequently enough to be worth mentioning. Smash who you want when you want and let the bitches talk. As long as you keep it on the low, so will they.


I feel you. Just giving advice based on his statement that he met them at uni. From my experience, word can get aroudn uni pretty quick. If nothing else, it's good advice to keep niggas standards up so they only deal with quality. I know it's worked for me.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Oct 11, 2012 @ 04:03
i began talking to my ex girlfriend again. i dated her for 4 years. im 18 graduated in 2011 and she's 17 a senior in high school. the reason we ended our relationship was because she said we were just better off as friends. during this whole relationship over course of time we have cheated and what not unforuntately more her than me and i was pretty damn hurt. i guess i got over it kind of and she has gotten over what i've done but anyways we began talking again and well idk i guess i do miss her, while we stopped dating i definitely got over her from working and just hanging out with friends and stuff but im not the best with girls either to be honest, she did nothing with her time and was always sad and what not and missed me. soo yeahh i guess we're taking it sloww she says she's pretty happy with me and all she needs is me and her family at the moment. but i feel like she's coming back to me just because theres nothing else for her?? anyways i guess im giving it a try again but im definitely not going back to my old ways with spending guap and shit until i know she's serious because im no idiot fool me once shame on me fool me twice shame on me haha but yeah i just dont wanna waste my time. but i do love her and she loves me. its confusing but i hope im making the right decision has anyone ever been in a situation like this?


dating a high school senior is usually not the best idea. if she's the studious type then she'll definitely be going off to college next year. best not to get too attached my dude, because that shit will hurt later if you guys are still together when she moves
Oct 11, 2012 @ 04:20
Yo, DM, just a thought I had:

How are decent girls raised? Most I know have daddy issues and aren't really that go-getter, independent type. Wtf happened to all the confident females (who can take a dick and be a lady on the streets as well)?
Oct 11, 2012 @ 04:27
Yo, DM, just a thought I had:

How are decent girls raised? Most I know have daddy issues and aren't really that go-getter, independent type. Wtf happened to all the confident females (who can take a dick and be a lady on the streets as well)?

I know I'm not DM, but from what I noticed, the best type of females are those who have good relationships with their dads. For example, I know this FINE ass girl that's 19 going on 20, and she's still a virgin, has a job, going to school and her dad is pretty much her bestfriend.
Oct 11, 2012 @ 04:30
its having solid parents in general that produces the ideal bitch/wife material
dmwalking
Oct 11, 2012 @ 04:48
Yo, DM, just a thought I had:

How are decent girls raised? Most I know have daddy issues and aren't really that go-getter, independent type. Wtf happened to all the confident females (who can take a dick and be a lady on the streets as well)?


There's a lot of variables my man. But truth be told, the young brothers already made the most solid point. IMO, it's a solid relationship with their fathers. From my experience and observations, girls who had solid relationships with their fathers had no need for male attention and would not bend to the will of any nigga who was not on the father's good side.

But, don't judge every chick based on that. That's just like one of those up front factors. But every so often some girls may just have a strong enough personality to be their own women despite negative relationships with their parents. A good gauge is to observe how hungry for general attention she is (if it's high, it's a bad situation) and how hungry for male attention she is (if it's high, it's a bad situation). Haha.

As far as freak in the sheets/lady in the streets? You just need to find a woman who's secure enough in herself to be willing to enjoy sex. It may take time for some girls to open up, but if you can make em trust you, they'll open up a lot. Make em love you, they'll do anything for you.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

Oct 11, 2012 @ 04:58
Wow DM, my question got answered already and I just check back to see if there is similar situations as me, but I have to say you are a man of wisdom. You could help a lot of people in this thread. blushing

muhstakes.tumblr.com | IG: muhstvkes

Oct 11, 2012 @ 19:42
@jemstayshininn I know exactly how you feel man.

Bitches be crazy.
Oct 24, 2012 @ 07:20
Okay so I've known this girl for approximately 4 years, and I'm really starting to like her as more than a friend. We have been pretty good friends over the years, and now we're really close. I have seen her go through 2 boyfriends which lead to two failing relationships. There have been times over the years where we weren't as close, but I think we're the closest now. She tells me about her financial difficulties, tells me about trouble in school, and tells me pretty much everything. I occasionally pick her up from her school (which is 2 hours away) and I used to take her to work every now and then when she had a job. When we hang out she always tells me about random events in her life and if we go out to eat I always pay for the both of us (even though she recently started to pay for me even when I ask her not to). Whenever she leaves me I always give her a hug (yes I initiate it) and when we haven't seen each other in a long time we always hug. But for some reason I think she isn't a very affectionate person. I REALLY like this girl and I want to ask her out, or show her that I'm interested in some way. Hypebeast what should I do? smh

HB 325 PostHardcore/Metalcore/MelodicHardcore/Punk/PopPunk/ Skacore

Oct 24, 2012 @ 07:21
Okay so I've known this girl for approximately 4 years, and I'm really starting to like her as more than a friend. We have been pretty good friends over the years, and now we're really close. I have seen her go through 2 boyfriends which lead to two failing relationships. There have been times over the years where we weren't as close, but I think we're the closest now. She tells me about her financial difficulties, tells me about trouble in school, and tells me pretty much everything. I occasionally pick her up from her school (which is 2 hours away) and I used to take her to work every now and then when she had a job. When we hang out she always tells me about random events in her life and if we go out to eat I always pay for the both of us (even though she recently started to pay for me even when I ask her not to). Whenever she leaves me I always give her a hug (yes I initiate it) and when we haven't seen each other in a long time we always hug. But for some reason I think she isn't a very affectionate person. I REALLY like this girl and I want to ask her out, or show her that I'm interested in some way. Hypebeast what should I do? smh

HB 325 PostHardcore/Metalcore/MelodicHardcore/Punk/PopPunk/ Skacore

Oct 24, 2012 @ 08:32
Okay so I've known this girl for approximately 4 years, and I'm really starting to like her as more than a friend. We have been pretty good friends over the years, and now we're really close. I have seen her go through 2 boyfriends which lead to two failing relationships. There have been times over the years where we weren't as close, but I think we're the closest now. She tells me about her financial difficulties, tells me about trouble in school, and tells me pretty much everything. I occasionally pick her up from her school (which is 2 hours away) and I used to take her to work every now and then when she had a job. When we hang out she always tells me about random events in her life and if we go out to eat I always pay for the both of us (even though she recently started to pay for me even when I ask her not to). Whenever she leaves me I always give her a hug (yes I initiate it) and when we haven't seen each other in a long time we always hug. But for some reason I think she isn't a very affectionate person. I REALLY like this girl and I want to ask her out, or show her that I'm interested in some way. Hypebeast what should I do? smh


And you ain't tappin? Damn b

@b_low_brown Killerbrownies.tumblr.com

Oct 24, 2012 @ 08:51
Okay so I've known this girl for approximately 4 years, and I'm really starting to like her as more than a friend. We have been pretty good friends over the years, and now we're really close. I have seen her go through 2 boyfriends which lead to two failing relationships. There have been times over the years where we weren't as close, but I think we're the closest now. She tells me about her financial difficulties, tells me about trouble in school, and tells me pretty much everything. I occasionally pick her up from her school (which is 2 hours away) and I used to take her to work every now and then when she had a job. When we hang out she always tells me about random events in her life and if we go out to eat I always pay for the both of us (even though she recently started to pay for me even when I ask her not to). Whenever she leaves me I always give her a hug (yes I initiate it) and when we haven't seen each other in a long time we always hug. But for some reason I think she isn't a very affectionate person. I REALLY like this girl and I want to ask her out, or show her that I'm interested in some way. Hypebeast what should I do? smh


dont waste your time you're in the friendzone
Oct 24, 2012 @ 19:37
Originally posted by Inactive User
Okay so I've known this girl for approximately 4 years, and I'm really starting to like her as more than a friend. We have been pretty good friends over the years, and now we're really close. I have seen her go through 2 boyfriends which lead to two failing relationships. There have been times over the years where we weren't as close, but I think we're the closest now. She tells me about her financial difficulties, tells me about trouble in school, and tells me pretty much everything. I occasionally pick her up from her school (which is 2 hours away) and I used to take her to work every now and then when she had a job. When we hang out she always tells me about random events in her life and if we go out to eat I always pay for the both of us (even though she recently started to pay for me even when I ask her not to). Whenever she leaves me I always give her a hug (yes I initiate it) and when we haven't seen each other in a long time we always hug. But for some reason I think she isn't a very affectionate person. I REALLY like this girl and I want to ask her out, or show her that I'm interested in some way. Hypebeast what should I do? smh


dont waste your time you're in the friendzone

That's the problem. How do I get out? I really like this girl, but I have no idea if she'd be interested in being more than friends. I know I fucked up by waiting so long to make a move, but I really wasn't sure how I felt about her til now.

HB 325 PostHardcore/Metalcore/MelodicHardcore/Punk/PopPunk/ Skacore

Oct 24, 2012 @ 20:53
You can't get out of the friend zone she has to let you in to the date zone

And she won't ever do that unless she knows you're definitely interested

Hold her hand when y'all hang out nigga yolo

@b_low_brown Killerbrownies.tumblr.com

Oct 24, 2012 @ 21:25
.
dmwalking
Oct 24, 2012 @ 21:31
Okay so I've known this girl for approximately 4 years, and I'm really starting to like her as more than a friend. We have been pretty good friends over the years, and now we're really close. I have seen her go through 2 boyfriends which lead to two failing relationships. There have been times over the years where we weren't as close, but I think we're the closest now. She tells me about her financial difficulties, tells me about trouble in school, and tells me pretty much everything. I occasionally pick her up from her school (which is 2 hours away) and I used to take her to work every now and then when she had a job. When we hang out she always tells me about random events in her life and if we go out to eat I always pay for the both of us (even though she recently started to pay for me even when I ask her not to). Whenever she leaves me I always give her a hug (yes I initiate it) and when we haven't seen each other in a long time we always hug. But for some reason I think she isn't a very affectionate person. I REALLY like this girl and I want to ask her out, or show her that I'm interested in some way. Hypebeast what should I do? smh


Damn son. I was like, Ok, Ok, this is salvagable....ok....and then I got to the bolded and I was just like....damn b. This nigga deep in the friendzone.

*Sigh* you got some sacrifices that you gotta be prepared to make my dude. 1. Are you willing to lose her as a friend? That's number one. Matter fact, that's the only number. If you aren't prepared to do this, then stop reading immediately. Cuz listen, if she becomes your girl, she's no longer a friend. If she rejects you, you'd be a vagina to stay in the friendzone and do all that driving 4 hours and all that. SMH. So, you ready?

So before I hit you with the advice, lemme give you a little analogy. You need to understand the friendzone before you understand how to get out of the friendzone. So check:

Women have two pools. The friendzone pool and the non friendzone pool.

The friendzone pool is always nice and warm for weak and/or non threatening males. Thing is, a lotta weak niggas opt for the freind pool because they're so desperate for that girl's attention that they'll take anything and that nice warm pool is easy to settle into. Niggas with platonic friendships that ain't in the friendzone might dip their legs in at a party while enjoying a drink at a part. But freindzone dudes be straight backstroking in that piece. Swimming in the deep end with snorkels and all that.

The non friendzone pool is usually cold. Straight up. YOU gotta warm it up. And just like a cold ass pool, it's worse if you try to ease your way in. It's best to just jump in all at once, get that cold shock over with and get used to the cold. Then you gotta warm that pool up little by little. Ever talk to a girl you never met before? If you start slow, it gets awkward fast. If you just jump in with confidence, you have a better chance of warming her up to you.

Now some niggas do start off in the friendzone pool briefly just because they dig a chick and they just like her company. That's ok. It's all about the transition to the cold pool. Niggas that dip their toes to see how cold it is usually fail cuz they punk out. Dipping your toes is like, dropping little compliments here and there to see how she responds. Or getting her sentimental gifts. This is awkward. This is weak. You will only make her want to kick you into the friendzone pool. But the smart ones get out that pool quick and jump into the cold pool. They suffer a harsher cold shock cuz they came from the warm pool, but they have a better chance of success because they didn't hang in the friendzone too long.

Niggas who stay in the friendzone for years.....smh....well, you're there because it's comfortable. You're there because it's easy. You barely have the balls to step outside the pool. It's unlikely you'll ever leave the comfort of the warm pool for the hard work of the cold pool.

Now, the advice comes in the next post.

HB stands for Help Beast. Currently supporting the supportive movement.

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