I hate getting hard at the wrong time

January 19, 2009 @ 22:15:47
because today the lady standing in front of me at walmart was gorgeous as hell and had the ass of gods, so i got a boner that went like straight through the flap of my boxers and started like scraping the front of my weewee on the back of the zipper.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:17:46
girls secretly want to see it so next time pull it out
January 19, 2009 @ 22:18:09
You need to cop some boxer briefs killa.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:18:14
small or tiny?
January 19, 2009 @ 22:18:38
You have a small penis.


where you there? cause that's what the check-out girl told him too
January 19, 2009 @ 22:19:36
Its huge as hell, its like 5 inched erect haha... well, im asian.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:19:44
Try the tuck up if you can do it discretely.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:26:36
You need to cop some boxer briefs killa.


.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:28:04
Straight up next time, you should just quickly shove your hand down your pants, grab your wiener and tuck it up (no homo). Do it as fast as you can though.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:29:51
yes boxer briefs saved my life as a life guard
January 19, 2009 @ 22:30:18
^^^ these niiiguhs kno wsup..
just like turn around kinda like you lookin at somethin and pretend u scratchin ur stomach and real quick flip your dick up onto your waistband

i actually learned something good from superbad
January 19, 2009 @ 22:31:32
bend down like your tying your shoe. then "scratch" your belly, but really grab your cock and stuff that fucker in your waistband. REAL TALK.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:32:15
wrong like chi said girls secretly liek to watch. so flip it up openly. as in face the girl, and flick u dick up
January 19, 2009 @ 22:33:53
Its huge as hell, its like 5 inched erect haha... well, im asian.


cool

January 19, 2009 @ 22:35:00
The best way is to pull it out and commandeer it like a raging, out-of-control dragon, making sure to wave it around fiercely and making dragon sounds.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:36:13
another solution is transparent pants, they don't have zippers
January 19, 2009 @ 22:41:56
The best way is to pull it out and commandeer it like a raging, out-of-control dragon, making sure to wave it around fiercely and making dragon sounds.
January 19, 2009 @ 22:45:59
never a wrong time for getting hard
January 19, 2009 @ 22:47:27
its easy to seee what what draws me to esurance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzUFtff0zWc
January 19, 2009 @ 22:49:41
5 inches?

pss, i'm 5 inches WIDE
January 19, 2009 @ 22:52:35
^^
thats another great option...or you could do what this kid did:
yes it is def worth the read.

-Timmy Smith, a 13 year-old former Halo 2 and Xbox Live smack-talk addict, was voluntarily admitted by his parents into Sunnyside Acres State Mental Facility in Lincoln on Tuesday.

Recent events in his video game behavior sent Smith reeling into a bout with self-discovery. In an effort to build his laughable social skills, Smith reported to football coach, Wes Leary, of the East Lexington High Knights.

“Let me just say that at 5 feet 7 inches and 115 pounds, Timmy ain’t the most intimidating being you ever met,” Leary said in a recent interview. “And when he talks, I thought I was talking to a girl that wanted to play ball. Not the most manly voice. Ah, who am I kiddin’, he was downright feminine. But the boy could talk some smack. Hell, it was worth having him on the team just to teach the other guys what a sailor sounded like. He had a worse mouth than any jockey I ever met. But I’ll be damned if I didn’t think of Alvin the chipmunk every time he opened his mouth.”

Smith’s two-day career on the spring training football squad was both colorful and painful. He tried out for several positions, the first of which was wide receiver.

Leary explained, “No matter what play Everrett called (he’s our offensive coordinator, ya understand), you could hear Timmy: ‘I call the ball! Give that [fecal matter] to me, son, and I’ll show you what a man can do with it.’ Whenever we didn’t opt to pass to Timmy, he’d come back grumbling about how he had ‘pwndizzled’ the defense, and he’d of had a touch down. He called the quarterback a ‘[slang for female dog]’, and even called Everrett a ‘newb’. He got to do a few extra up-downs after that particular practice.”

Frustrated, Smith begged the coaches to put him on defense. He told them that he knew he’d be the best linebacker that they had ever seen. Knowing otherwise, the coaches decided to just shut him up by giving him a shot at the position.

“It was the funniest thing I ever saw,” Leary said chuckling. “He thought he was so tough. I’ll never forget the image of Timmy laying in a trash-talking crumpled heap after Jamison Bertring (the Knights All-State starting running back) just ran him over. He was yellin’ at us between sobs. ‘You [slang for intercourse] cheaters! You ain’t nothing without your damn linemen. If my defensive line wasn’t a bunch of [buttocks]-licking circle-[slang for masterbation], I’d have beat your pansy [buttocks] down and put you in your place. Just like I did with your mom last night.’ But you gotta give him some credit. [Buttocks]-licking circle-[slang for masterbation]? That’s priceless.”

Smith’s expulsion from the school and the team was a result of what is now known as the “locker room incident.”

“Practice was over, and everyone was cleaning up to go home. Timmy got some wacky idea from somewhere. Must have had something to do with those video games I read about before he joined the team. He was getting ready for the shower, when he saw some guys sitting around, talking about the practice. Next thing you know, Timmy’s naked and running around, smacking these guys in the forehead with his [slang for testicles]. ‘Sacktacular!’ he yelled. All the guys just sat there in shock, and so did I. ‘Sack Frenzy! Sacktrocity! Sackamonjaro! Ya like a little [racial slur referring to white people] with your tea, [slang for female dogs]?’ The guys started to move. I tried to get out there, but I wasn’t fast enough. Don’t move as fast as I used to, and those kids are all faster than I am. Poor Timmy didn’t have a chance. That crazy bastard.”

After a necessary stay in the local hospital, Smith checked himself into Sunnyside Acres, with the blessing of his parents.

“We can only hope that time will heal his mind and mend the broken bones,” Linda Smith, Timmy’s mother, said. “I still blame those damn games. Gary and I are excellent parents, so it has to be those games that did this to my little angel. And don’t even get us started on those football players.”
January 19, 2009 @ 23:01:34
Is that real? If it is, than ass lickin circle beating and sacktacular are my new favorite words.
January 19, 2009 @ 23:04:11
i highly doubt it, but that shouldnt stop sacktacular from being your favorite word
January 19, 2009 @ 23:32:48
Is that real? If it is, than ass lickin circle beating and sacktacular are my new favorite words.


uh it was circle jerker sir... nice try tho

www.NickyDsss.com

January 19, 2009 @ 23:36:18
Ya like a little cracka with your tea, b****es? el o el
January 19, 2009 @ 23:39:18
sing the pledge of allegiance it will go down at least thats what i herd...
January 19, 2009 @ 23:43:35
ok i'm one for a good laugh and all, but don't answer honestly guys. it's a trap, there is never a wrong time to get hard. unappropriate maybe, but not wrong. who worries about a boner in front of a hot girl but a fassie?
January 19, 2009 @ 23:52:40
uh it was circle jerker sir... nice try tho

ahh "circle jerk off" is the answer we were looking for

Richard Cumming: word if your dick aint wet 24/7 you’re a simp. if theres no pussy around bess b’lee dat i got my dick in a glass of water

January 19, 2009 @ 23:53:58
hey guys, this one time i got a boner
January 19, 2009 @ 23:54:01
blinkyeyes at Timmy.
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