How do you deal with strict Asian parents? - Page 5

December 18, 2008 @ 04:27 AM

Phlipstar

Post: 1824

Join Date: Mar 2006

Location: Illmatic, Track 2

it's actually a lot harder than you make it sound brotha.

trust me i've tried it. and if it had worked, i wouldn't be at home right now spendin' all my days on HB

Yes its hard, but its doable. You just gotta reason, rebel, and negotiate your ass off. Always ask "why", have replies back to anything they throw at you, and when they pull the "i said so" card is when you can say how they are being unreasonable. Sooner or later they should give in either running out of excuses, getting tired of arguing or see that it really means alot to you.

Also you gotta keep a clean record. Remain on top of your shit to keep them happy ie getting good grades, staying on top of your priorities ie chores, w/e. It keeps them happy and see that you have responsibility. This way they have less against you and less of a reason to say no.

One last thing, i know you were against it, but seriously lying does wonders. Its not to be decietful or anything (well it is) but its just to give them a peace of mind. Shit, if my parents knew half the shit ive done theyd have a heart attack.

December 18, 2008 @ 11:55 AM

Jim Jardashian

Post: 3885

Join Date: Aug 2007

Location: Jermany Shore

Honestly, get a job.
Before I had a job it was like "Oh hey Im going to the mall" (it was the cool thing to do when you were 13 and 14 to just hang out at the mall with friends)

"uhm no you're not. you have no reason to be at the mall you have no money and you're not going to hang around the mall like an idiot"

So I had to lie and say I was going to the movies, and then just ask the theatre people what the movie was about, etc etc..

But when you have a job..

"Hey Im going to the mall"

"for what?"

"To look for jacket/go to movies etc etc"

"Oh.. ok"

And then use that time to galavant and do what you want.

Then you went to my house and we ate strawberry ice cream.

December 18, 2008 @ 12:08 PM

!OhYesHeDid!

Post: 2114

Join Date: Sep 2007

Location: New York City,By way...

obviously you havent experienced asian parents firsthand.

gtfo.

dog your a fucking queer ass dude getting macked by your parents. grow up and get the fuck out of the house. just cause your a fuck up to the highest degree doesnt mean every asian kid in america is gonna fuck up if they rebel a bit against their parents. shut up son like seriously

December 30, 2008 @ 04:31 AM

JLASA

Post: 1031

Join Date: Oct 2007

Location: Vancouver/Calgary

yes its hard, but its doable. You just gotta reason, rebel, and negotiate your ass off. Always ask "why", have replies back to anything they throw at you, and when they pull the "i said so" card is when you can say how they are being unreasonable. Sooner or later they should give in either running out of excuses, getting tired of arguing or see that it really means alot to you.

Also you gotta keep a clean record. Remain on top of your shit to keep them happy ie getting good grades, staying on top of your priorities ie chores, w/e. It keeps them happy and see that you have responsibility. This way they have less against you and less of a reason to say no.

One last thing, i know you were against it, but seriously lying does wonders. Its not to be decietful or anything (well it is) but its just to give them a peace of mind. Shit, if my parents knew half the shit ive done theyd have a heart attack.

qfmft

December 30, 2008 @ 06:24 AM

.IC3.

Post: 570

Join Date: Oct 2008

ok man i use to have this problem too...

i aint lieing so listen..

firstly you have to EXPLAIN everythign thats going to happen when you want to go out.

list all possibilites.... of what you can do whenever an incident occurs...

and when you go out, frequently tell them where ur going and wat ur going to do. (this will gain their trust..)

but teh most importnat part i think is

EXPLAIN REASONABLY.....

December 30, 2008 @ 06:45 AM

soulamazing.

Post: 5482

Join Date: Jan 2008

Location: Adverse City.

^ how you gon get on him for giving some decent advice? The fuck does it matter if he is Asian or not, parents are parents. I dont give a fuck if you think shit isnt the same cuz of different cultures, yall acting like his parents are making him eat dog-shit. Some niiggas have it way worse.

Kickin' knowledge.

December 30, 2008 @ 06:47 AM

soulamazing.

Post: 5482

Join Date: Jan 2008

Location: Adverse City.

challenge your father to a duel, then win and force him to commit seppuku

Fixed.

December 30, 2008 @ 01:37 PM

alimentezmoi

Post: 2

Join Date: Dec 2008

I'm obviously late to this conversation but I hope someone can still help a person out with this issue.

I'm your average Chinese who was born in China but raised in eastern America. My parents love me to the extreme, does everything for the sake of the family and would do anything for my brother and I. The problem? I'm a fcuking 18 year old college student still living under their rooftop. As much as they love me, they love controlling me even more. Yes, because I live with them its only respectful to obey their rules but its so crazy, the way they act to the point where its ridiculous. I understand its everything this post has already said, they don't want me in the wrong crowd, they don't want me to mess up and live a hard life, they just want a good life for me. But I can't deal with being out at 12 pm at night, looking at my phone for the first time since an hour ago and seeing 57 missed calls, all consecutively. 10:57, 10:58, 10:59, 11:00, 11:01, 11:02, the list goes on all the way till 12 am my friends. And last night, came home at 2 am, told them i was coming home at 2 am, having them call me at 1:55 am, i didnt pick up because i was literally 3 minutes from the front door. Their reaction?? Because i missed 15 calls over 5 minutes my mother was chucking stuff at my face and calling me a whore and a wild woman, saying i lost control of my life and I should just move out.

I didn't come here to whine, I didnt come here to say oh I have it bad, rather I'm being biased by telling you about my parents at their worst yet they can be great parents, but can anyone tell me whether I should move out or not? My friend lives in the next state, practically told me shes coming to jersey to get me, and im debating really leaving and tranfering schools there. The thing is, my parents probably won't let me back in the house if I leave.

Sorry about the long message and much kudos to those who offer advice.

December 30, 2008 @ 01:45 PM

alimentezmoi

Post: 2

Join Date: Dec 2008

Oh and the reason why I'm asking people is because I've always yield to my parents. I have to say im a good daughter on every aspect except the going out issue and I've done my best. I'm just so at a loss of how they'd react if i do leave, I'm afraid they'd hate me forever.

December 30, 2008 @ 02:32 PM

STI Guy

Post: 4516

Join Date: Jan 2007

Location: nyc

for the sake of our motherfucking race in this fucking country, i have made a vow to myself and all you chin.ks should too. i promised myself that if i ever become a parent i will NOT parent my children like an immigrant asian parent. hopefully that will let our race be more exposed to our surroundings and open more doors.

December 30, 2008 @ 02:49 PM

aww_fresh

Post: 177

Join Date: Mar 2007

Location: Helltown Northern Ca...

I'm obviously late to this conversation but I hope someone can still help a person out with this issue.

I'm your average Chinese who was born in China but raised in eastern America. My parents love me to the extreme, does everything for the sake of the family and would do anything for my brother and I. The problem? I'm a fcuking 18 year old college student still living under their rooftop. As much as they love me, they love controlling me even more. Yes, because I live with them its only respectful to obey their rules but its so crazy, the way they act to the point where its ridiculous. I understand its everything this post has already said, they don't want me in the wrong crowd, they don't want me to mess up and live a hard life, they just want a good life for me. But I can't deal with being out at 12 pm at night, looking at my phone for the first time since an hour ago and seeing 57 missed calls, all consecutively. 10:57, 10:58, 10:59, 11:00, 11:01, 11:02, the list goes on all the way till 12 am my friends. And last night, came home at 2 am, told them i was coming home at 2 am, having them call me at 1:55 am, i didnt pick up because i was literally 3 minutes from the front door. Their reaction?? Because i missed 15 calls over 5 minutes my mother was chucking stuff at my face and calling me a whore and a wild woman, saying i lost control of my life and I should just move out.

I didn't come here to whine, I didnt come here to say oh I have it bad, rather I'm being biased by telling you about my parents at their worst yet they can be great parents, but can anyone tell me whether I should move out or not? My friend lives in the next state, practically told me shes coming to jersey to get me, and im debating really leaving and tranfering schools there. The thing is, my parents probably won't let me back in the house if I leave.

Sorry about the long message and much kudos to those who offer advice.

Your problem mainly has to do with you being a female. Sucks, but it's true. I personally believe that parents are naturally more over protective of their daughters.

It's a double edged sword (pause). If parents are to lenient, their daughter becomes a slut. If the parents are to over protective, their daughter becomes a slut. Parents just need to find the right balance, but that's a difficult thing to achieve.

www.mixcrate.com/sonicboombox

December 30, 2008 @ 05:09 PM

Razors Edge

Post: 264

Join Date: Sep 2007

man listlen to me, seriosly. I'm also a sophmore. But Listlen to wtf i'm sayinn.

LISTLEN TO YOUR FUCKING PARENTS! got that?

I'm white. My parents don't give a shit about me. I can sleep over, go wherever the fuck I want. I blaze everday, go to parties..alla dat shit. My grades are horrible, F's. I never did good in school, so my parents lost hope in my awhile ago. The thing is though, my parents don't give a shit about me, I gotta buy my own food, cook it, I gotta pay for all my own shit. They wont buy me clothes or any of dat. Id rather be locked inside my house with a good relationship to my parents & have them support me rather be the way it is now.

Just listlen to your fuckin parents, make them happy. Work a deal out with them or some shit, be like "i'll do what you want/expect from me in return for...."...etc.

June 10, 2009 @ 06:10 PM

twothousand1.

Post: 609

Join Date: Feb 2008

I don't...
I'm 16, I do whatever the fuck I want!

my rents are pretty chill though
curfew is like 12 or just be home and not make any noise....
sometimes they give me money too to go eat and stuff like that..
my dad is down to drive me places at times but lately no....
other than that, it's not really that bad

June 10, 2009 @ 06:43 PM

SDO

Post: 55

Join Date: Oct 2008

Location: Stockton, CA

im filipino and my dad was in the flip military and hes one of the strictest parents on the planet, even my cousins and aunts uncles knows he gots a rep of being strict, all you got to do is to shut up and listen, do what they say and once you move out your free to do wtf you want

June 10, 2009 @ 09:34 PM

itZj0k3R

Post: 577

Join Date: Sep 2008

Location: Youngstown, OH

Tell them how you feel.

June 10, 2009 @ 09:44 PM

kaboom

Post: 454

Join Date: Jun 2008

Tell them how you feel.

fuck outta here

June 10, 2009 @ 09:57 PM

Jaylib

Post: 1736

Join Date: Jun 2008

Location: Y0K0 JP

if u watch kevjumba u will know wsup

June 10, 2009 @ 09:59 PM

scfdefinit

Post: 936

Join Date: Jun 2006

Location: San Diego

I've never had this problem really, I mean my mom used to call me a bunch when I was in my teens asking where I am and shit. But, I guess they just trust my judgement and don't worry too much.

But, real talk, how do you deal with girls with super protective parents man? I just want to chill but she can't and has to be home all the time. Shit is ridiculous. I can't even come over! She thinks her dad will trip out and shit. I understand Alimentezmoi's situation. It's the same, I'm in college too and I honestly don't even know how one would deal with that shit. Does a person just wait til school is over and they move out? That's just too much.

June 10, 2009 @ 10:05 PM

estoybien

Post: 1169

Join Date: Sep 2007

Location: NYC/NJ

lol i'm chinese and my parents are so chill. as long as i do well in school (which is most important), i can pretty much do anything. they're def some of the most lax asian parents around here.

June 10, 2009 @ 10:44 PM

Jarmel

Post: 467

Join Date: May 2009

Location: Megan Fox's Davenpor...

u don't

June 10, 2009 @ 11:42 PM

pierre pierre

Post: 153

Join Date: Mar 2009

Location: sweden

yup, u dont.
or you get the metal hanger to the ass.

December 4, 2010 @ 01:31 PM

tellmewhentogo

Post: 2951

Join Date: Jun 2009

Lately, my mom and I have been fighting like fuckkkk.

She keeps mentioning how because I went to a good high school, I should be killing my college classes with A's.

She needs to get this fucking stupid mentality out of her head. It's only holding her back.

PS - My college grades are nothing near A's.

December 4, 2010 @ 01:56 PM

keothekilla

Post: 1238

Join Date: Apr 2008

Location: washington

argument with parents? go on hypebeast

http://www.anthonykeo.com/

December 4, 2010 @ 02:00 PM

*ER!C

Post: 1614

Join Date: May 2008

Location: QUEENS

man listlen to me, seriosly. I'm also a sophmore. But Listlen to wtf i'm sayinn.

LISTLEN TO YOUR FUCKING PARENTS! got that?

I'm white. My parents don't give a shit about me. I can sleep over, go wherever the fuck I want. I blaze everday, go to parties..alla dat shit. My grades are horrible, F's. I never did good in school, so my parents lost hope in my awhile ago. The thing is though, my parents don't give a shit about me, I gotta buy my own food, cook it, I gotta pay for all my own shit. They wont buy me clothes or any of dat. Id rather be locked inside my house with a good relationship to my parents & have them support me rather be the way it is now.

Just listlen to your fuckin parents, make them happy. Work a deal out with them or some shit, be like "i'll do what you want/expect from me in return for...."...etc.

word just listlen to ur parents

December 4, 2010 @ 02:04 PM

SHOGUNATE

Post: 508

Join Date: Jul 2009

Location: Califas

Become a doctor and they will leave your ass alone

December 4, 2010 @ 07:36 PM

taxi

Post: 79

Join Date: Nov 2010

lol being white rules

/racism

December 4, 2010 @ 07:38 PM

WastelandBone

Post: 188

Join Date: May 2010

Location: Cana-DUH

for the sake of our motherfucking race in this fucking country, i have made a vow to myself and all you chin.ks should too. i promised myself that if i ever become a parent i will NOT parent my children like an immigrant asian parent. hopefully that will let our race be more exposed to our surroundings and open more doors.

Thank You.

December 4, 2010 @ 07:40 PM

STI Guy

Post: 4516

Join Date: Jan 2007

Location: nyc

wow i dont even remember writing that haha.

December 4, 2010 @ 08:13 PM

tellmewhentogo

Post: 2951

Join Date: Jun 2009

^ You're right, though.

I straight up told my mom I'd be a better parent than her. Or at least not bring my kids up the way she brought me up.

December 4, 2010 @ 08:53 PM

Legit Shit

Post: 2282

Join Date: Feb 2010

Location: so flo

Don't feel like reading trough the thread so idk if it's been discussed, but get a job. Parents usually ease up when they see you can manage being somewhat independent.

upthefunk