Originally posted by Inactive UserHad this ass existed in ancient times, wars would have been waged over it. Men would have fought and died, just to catch nary a glimpse of it. Entire cities leveled, and armies so far and wide as the Aegean Sea would have stood at the ready, poised to cause death and destruction, if only to cup a hand around it's shapely smoothness. The only reason that these wars did not happen is the fact that this fanny is the product of millions of years of ass evolution, and such asses were not only uncommon in ancient times, they were completely unheard of. Not even Michaelangelo could have carved such an ass out of marble, not in a month of Mondays. This ass is the one reason why I still have a glimmer of hope of Gods existence.
The sad thing is, is that this ass can only get worse with time. The only place you can go with this level of ass perfection is down, unless, by using some sort of Quantum Ass Mechanics, one could somehow send this ass into the metaphorical stratosphere, with the ratio of plumpness, size, shape, and smoothness balanced out to within a millionth decimal point. However, this is only theory, and the sad reality we live in is that asses reach a peak, and can only degrade. I find this incredibly sad, and the one solace that keeps me going through the motions of daily life is that new asses are born each day, and with the exponential advance of knowledge in the regions of ass-science, each one has the chance to become equal, if not more luscious than the current ass in question. As you may know, Everest grows an inch every year, so I can only imagine the level of ass-perfection waiting in the years to come. Pun intended.
*starts a slow clap...tear rolls down eye*