so yesterday and i was like shit im hungry as fuck so let me hit dat chiptole real quick ja feel
gotta get the burrito cause the bowl if for little phaggots.
so the next mornin i wake up and my stomach feelin a lil weird but nothings cereal so im like shit dis aint shit
so i ignore it and drive to school. now keep in mind that i commute and my school is like 30 min away.
now before i hit the highway to go to school im feelin a lil hungry so im like lemme go to 7-11 real quick a grab somthin to munch on. so i get a banana-strawberry milk with a chicken buffalo sandwitch (yall know those sandwitches that are already made in plastic wraps)
so im eatin while driving and shit and i feel cool. now i get to school and the parkin garage to campus is like 10 min.
im like 3/4 there and im like wtf is this shit my stomach starts hurting like hell.
now i continue to man it out and keep walking but as soon as i hit the stairs inside the building, im like oh hell naw im goin back home to take a shit (i dont shit in public bathrooms cause they dirty as shit) so im like fuck class i already got that A on my midterm, now like i said it takes 10 min to walk back to the parking garage but my stomach hurts even more and im literally farting out my asshole like theres no tomorrow thank God the winds was blowing hard cause there was some cute girls behind me and shit. halfway to the garage im like oh fuck this i cant hold this shit for another 30 min so i WALK BACK
to campus to go take a shit thats literally about to come out if someone pokes my stomach. now im walking tryna look smoove as if err thang alright but damn i felt like usain bolting to the bathroom.
so i go to da bathroom and im like thanks be to God cause aint no one there. so im there taking a shit and 1 min later someone comes in and im like SHIT let me keep my asshole quiet. so he walks out and im literally sending a nuclear bomb down that toilet R.I.P. to da toilet. now its time for me to wipe BUT MY FUCKING APCS ARE TOO FUCKING SKINNY to the point where i can barely pull them down. literally, that shit went down to like my thighs. so now im standing up literally and bending down as if im touching my toes just to wipe my fucking ass. FUCK APCS. after im done im feelin better so im like shit let me just hit up class im only 20 min late.
but damn dat shit was horrible my booty hole felt dirty as fuck cause i couldnt wipe properly smh.
moral of the story:
never wear apcs to take a shit
always poop before u hit school.