i made the decision a while ago that i'd change my major from interior design to illustration. now i'm "starting over" so i've lost all sorts of motivation (and personal motivation even) that only now am i starting to slowly shift my way back up.
i think it's mainly due to the fact that im about to adopt a puppy soon. i dont know why but for some reason, when the time happens, i really hope that if and when i become a mother, i become a very damned well good one. since i dont want a baby now, a puppy (or other pet) would be a good way to start. but i'm also getting the puppy for depression and motivation reasons.
i've been in a slump that i'm very much aware about. i've been trying to stay positive (easier said than done) but because i'm so ~depressing~, it's kind of hard to push forward.
with the help of my gentleman friend reminding me that i need to learn to love myself and that maybe i need to be my own motivation, i've been giving myself random uplifters in terms of random "33 ways to stay creative" and applying 1 number to my day and now writing down self improving and positive quotes in a tiny notebook.
my house also isn't the best type of household. it's very unorganized and everyones kind of eh. but they are also aware of what's wrong but lack support and motivation as well. since I, somehow being that much more intelligent than them ;P, have this instinct to make this house better for the puppy, i'm going on this whole positive, everything's good, everything's going roll... and i've realized, people are motivated and influenced a lot by my actions (i dont get it but it just happens) ...
so maybe you just gotta be your own motivation... be your own positive words. i have a hard time trying to look at myself in the mirror to say great things to me, about me, so instead.. i write them down... or i kinda "talk to myself"... idk...
OR YOU CAN GET A PUPPY AND PAPA INSTINCTS WILL COME WITH THE QUICKNESS.
-- please note that it's 3:42 AM and im probably high and tired and in crazy mama prepping mode.
do what makes you happy. i think i'd be happy as an illustrator and a mama. my babies will be my motivation :3
~*~*~*~ note: this is how you use a forum ^^^ ~*~*~*~
~*~*~*~ fuck the haters