so i’ve been hitting on this girl for a while now.. think i messed it up

November 07, 2012 @ 04:40:53 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
first off - she is from a small town and is VERY religious. she doesn't like kanye because she heard "jesus walks" and doesn't think its appropriate to mention his name over music. lol. so anyways, at work theres this old lady who walks around giving people condoms for donations to womens health. we always give her a dollar or two and she fills our pockets up with condoms.

i worked all night an didn't have a chance to come home, so im pretty tired at this point but the girl asks me out for a drink, and she's like "just before you go, i want you to know we are courting right now, and that does NOT involve anything touchy feely". i'm like ok, whatever, she's really hot (serious 9/10). so we have a good time, come home, her roomates watching Knights Tale with heath ledger. i sit with my girl and within 5 minutes i fall asleep. i wake up to a huge twitch, literally knock my girls hand off mine, look up, and ask her "hows your phone babygirl?".

her roomate is horrified and my girl (emma) starts laughing at me. shes like "if youre gonna go to sleep, you should get comfy and take off that jacket. her roomate is weirded out and is getting up to leave. it's pretty cold in her place and my jacket is comfy so i think ill just take all the shit out of my pockets and lie down so its not uncomfortable. as im emptying my pockets i make eye contact with her roomate and start apologizing. she is staring at me like i am insane, even more scared of me than before. emmas like "uhhhh wtf?? i think you should go". i forgot what was in my pockets and dropped two handfuls of condoms onto her coffee table while staring her roomate down.

anyways i left and havent talked to her since. should i text her?

EDIT: pic

November 07, 2012 @ 04:41:42 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
or call or just wait for her to contact me again?
November 07, 2012 @ 04:41:44 AM
Post: 1940
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: seattle
stopped reading after first sentence, u must be desperate fucking with a retard like that lmaoooo

i dont care about you

November 07, 2012 @ 04:42:12 AM
jaded
Forum Moderator
Post: 8322
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: ಠ______ಠ

i'm the best mayne, i deed it

November 07, 2012 @ 04:44:49 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
Originally posted by Inactive User
stopped reading after first sentence, u must be desperate fucking with a retard like that lmaoooo


she's easily 9/10
November 07, 2012 @ 04:45:28 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012


real useful post you belong in the 'bage
November 07, 2012 @ 04:46:05 AM
Post: 749
Join Date: Jun 2012
Come on nigga, you know this funny story is useless without pics of the girl.
November 07, 2012 @ 04:49:53 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
Come on nigga, you know this funny story is useless without pics of the girl.



model pics from facebook
November 07, 2012 @ 04:51:28 AM
Post: 533
Join Date: Dec 2010
have you tried raping her?

john lamone is a fag. boland is a fag.

November 07, 2012 @ 04:53:21 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
have you tried raping her?


?? your not worth the hair on a bees dick with comments like that
November 07, 2012 @ 04:59:57 AM
Post: 2860
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Vashtie\'s Room
too much reading but i read the first sentence as well and she sounds dumb.

:)

November 07, 2012 @ 05:04:22 AM
Post: 3577
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: cold north
November 07, 2012 @ 05:09:30 AM
Post: 1287
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: CANADA EH!
THIS AINT NO 9/10 NIGGA + IS THAT U WITH THAT PHAGGOT ASS MASK ON UR FACE ??
November 07, 2012 @ 05:21:28 AM
Post: 3031
Join Date: Jul 2009
super religious girls are awesome. it seems you've already established some report with this girl, so now you gotta start leading conversations into how dark and troubled your are. tell her you have some life problems and can't figure out what anything means. you feel unfulfilled and need purpose. imply you're suicidal to some degree. she's gonna eat that up and push church on you real hard. fight against it. tell her you're disillusioned by church and religion in general. say that her pushiness is making you uneasy and you'd rather not talk to her. she'll feel sorry for you and pray for you.

then...

one random night call her. tell her you were almost in a horrible car accident. you swerved out at the last minute and the car behind got fucked up. you assume the driver died, and you want to talk to her about it. tell her that you've been thinking about all the religion and church stuff she had been preaching. tell her that you want her to show you how to live a purpose drive life. say that now you've seen death in the face you now appreciate every moment of life. spontaneously kiss her and say that she saved your life. then she should be down to fuck.
November 07, 2012 @ 05:25:37 AM
Post: 51
Join Date: Aug 2012
THIS AINT NO 9/10 NIGGA + IS THAT U WITH THAT PHAGGOT ASS MASK ON UR FACE ??


JUST LOOK AT THEM LEGS EASILY -3 POINTS BCUZ OF THAT!!
November 07, 2012 @ 08:19:03 AM
Post: 2805
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: #OYYOYVille
first off - she is from a small town and is VERY religious. she doesn't like kanye because she heard "jesus walks" and doesn't think its appropriate to mention his name over music. lol. so anyways, at work theres this old lady who walks around giving people condoms for donations to womens health. we always give her a dollar or two and she fills our pockets up with condoms.

i worked all night an didn't have a chance to come home, so im pretty tired at this point but the girl asks me out for a drink, and she's like "just before you go, i want you to know we are courting right now, and that does NOT involve anything touchy feely". i'm like ok, whatever, she's really hot (serious 9/10). so we have a good time, come home, her roomates watching Knights Tale with heath ledger. i sit with my girl and within 5 minutes i fall asleep. i wake up to a huge twitch, literally knock my girls hand off mine, look up, and ask her "hows your phone babygirl?".

her roomate is horrified and my girl (emma) starts laughing at me. shes like "if youre gonna go to sleep, you should get comfy and take off that jacket. her roomate is weirded out and is getting up to leave. it's pretty cold in her place and my jacket is comfy so i think ill just take all the shit out of my pockets and lie down so its not uncomfortable. as im emptying my pockets i make eye contact with her roomate and start apologizing. she is staring at me like i am insane, even more scared of me than before. emmas like "uhhhh wtf?? i think you should go". i forgot what was in my pockets and dropped two handfuls of condoms onto her coffee table while staring her roomate down.

anyways i left and havent talked to her since. should i text her?

EDIT: pic



Damn. A girl you have a crush on his fucking a masked Stephen Baldwin?

November 07, 2012 @ 08:41:22 AM
Post: 400
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 415
two handfuls of condoms?
November 07, 2012 @ 10:16:25 AM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012


Damn. A girl you have a crush on his fucking a masked Stephen Baldwin?



shut your bitch mouth

This post is hidden due to user account is no longer active or improper post content.

November 07, 2012 @ 11:53:29 AM
Post: 526
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canada
what happened to the pic homie

Fly on little wing

November 07, 2012 @ 20:36:07 PM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
what happened to the pic homie


no idea heres link

http://i.imgur.com/zgFCA.jpg
November 07, 2012 @ 20:40:08 PM
Post: 1643
Join Date: Apr 2008
i think you messed it up. good story though. id say its worth it since you werent gonna get that butt anyway.
November 07, 2012 @ 20:46:47 PM
Post: 214
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: The Netherlands
Seriously thats funny as fuck, just explain it to her. She'll understand.
Goodluck!

Changed my name from Mojosodope to J_Got_The_Geass

November 07, 2012 @ 20:49:59 PM
Post: 1910
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Sparta
what happened to the pic homie
This and
super religious girls are awesome. it seems you've already established some report with this girl, so now you gotta start leading conversations into how dark and troubled your are. tell her you have some life problems and can't figure out what anything means. you feel unfulfilled and need purpose. imply you're suicidal to some degree. she's gonna eat that up and push church on you real hard. fight against it. tell her you're disillusioned by church and religion in general. say that her pushiness is making you uneasy and you'd rather not talk to her. she'll feel sorry for you and pray for you.

then...

one random night call her. tell her you were almost in a horrible car accident. you swerved out at the last minute and the car behind got fucked up. you assume the driver died, and you want to talk to her about it. tell her that you've been thinking about all the religion and church stuff she had been preaching. tell her that you want her to show you how to live a purpose drive life. say that now you've seen death in the face you now appreciate every moment of life. spontaneously kiss her and say that she saved your life. then she should be down to fuck.
'
dat detail 10/10 situation story

Cmon get down with a real nigga wussup

November 07, 2012 @ 21:12:40 PM
Post: 2463
Join Date: May 2008
Location: boston
OP is so thirsty. lol handful of condoms youll never use.
November 08, 2012 @ 19:51:00 PM
Post: 22
Join Date: Aug 2012
OP is so thirsty. lol handful of condoms youll never use.


i am 8.25/10 and have had sex with over 50 women
November 08, 2012 @ 20:15:34 PM
Post: 199
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: BIRMINGHAM UK
OP is so thirsty. lol handful of condoms youll never use.


i am 8.25/10 and have had sex with over 50 women


this you?
November 08, 2012 @ 20:35:04 PM
Post: 2463
Join Date: May 2008
Location: boston
OP is so thirsty. lol handful of condoms youll never use.


i am 8.25/10 and have had sex with over 50 women


What kind of grown man rates himself out of 10?

What kind of hypebeast forum user logs on and makes posts like yours if theyve smashed 50 women?

If I give you the benefit of the doubt I could say you were in it for the difficult ass chase and wanted to share this story on HB for kicks. I wont rule it out, but the odds are against it and you can understand my initial conclusion.
November 08, 2012 @ 21:53:19 PM
Post: 256
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: US
Just text her something like "it was pretty funny when i emptyed my pocket and all those condoms came out, i bet ur roommate thinks im a total creep"
November 08, 2012 @ 22:05:57 PM
Post: 1565
Join Date: Jun 2009
OP is so thirsty. lol handful of condoms youll never use.


i am 8.25/10 and have had sex with over 50 women

lol
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