Ight, I usually don't do this, but ima let you niccas in on some of my famous tactics and strategies for pullin' hizzo's. This is field tested shit and if done correctly will always -- at the bare minimum -- get you a date, let alone some interior (i coined dat). ~ <--- look at that squiggly thing.
First things first, you need to pick a target. A bitch wit a fat ass will do just fine. If not, settle for some racc city, don't trip, dey cool.
Sec0nd: Wait for this bitch to isolate herself. I'm talking elevators, hallways, outside patio for a cij? Any place where there are minimal distractions and is quiet enough where your voice can be heard. I hate repeating myself to the point that I never do.
Thrizzle: Make sure you got your game face on. But not that Kobe Bryant fourth quarter horse face shit. I'm talking that Trey Songz "Your Hair Is On Fire" shit. Don't be nervous. Why would you? You scared of pussy nicca? You ain't fux wt ho's mane? Fucc outta here.
Ight. Since inside elevators is where I've had my best results, I'ma continue this tutorial in the context of a text drama of just that, an elevator.
Scene: I'm posted up pushing buttons and shit. All a sudden *BAM* bitch walks chru. First thing I notice is racc city. I mean, tits is poppin outta the turtle necc. Doors close. She turns around and selects which floor she tryna travel to. [24]. Perfect, last floor and we're only on the 3rd. As her finger releases from the button you notice ass cheeks galore, i'm talking deliverance.
She's fine as wine so she already know she got me. She knows I want her. Because of this, I have to Buster Douglas a hoe. She's avoiding eye contact. bitch you don't even know what's coming. I tilt my head towards her as if to say something. I'm going in.... No introduction. No "excuse me" or "Can I ask you a question?" I wait untill she makes eye contact and then just...
Too Trill: So... What's your favorite Subway sandwich?
HB: Oh hell no. What the fucc is double T doing? This is game? Bitch nicca! Oh wait. She's smiling...
Hoe: *Smiles* What? *folds arms*
side note: 9/10 times they're going to say "what" "huh" "excuse me" which sets you up for this....
TooTrill: Ight look. It's 11 o' clock, you get out your car... turn around and look at your reflection in ur window. make sure the booty looks on point *Mimes checking out ones booty in car window reflection* You walk into Subway and when the employee asks what kind of sandwich you want, what do you say? *Extends hand out to influence answer*
Hoe: *HAHAHA. Wow. Umm... I'ma have to go with the Italian BMT haha
Too Trill: *Smirking* I ain't even gotta ask, you working with that provolone aren't cha
Hoe: haha.. mhm
Too Trill: You feelin toasty?
Hoe: Ah! I love it toasted! *arms unfold* *Reaching 15th floor*
Too Trill: Ight. Ight. I see you. How we doing on the veggies? You fux wit leaves n all that? *Points finger at hoe in a friendly matter* (It don't matter if she's properly spoken i.e. sophisticated, if said cutely "fux wit _____" gets a chuckle everytime! Dat foreign language swag).
Hoe: Everything but olives!
Too Trill: Haha cool cool... Well, I know what your favorite sandwich is but I don't even know your name. We both know that you're beautiful *smiles* and that I'm a spontaneous conservationist.
Hoe: *Smiles*
Too Trill: Lets learn something new about each other over our favorite sandwiches.
*smiling, hands hoe phone* You are what you eat right? *With a cheesy smirk* Let's be fresh!
Hoe: *shakes head while punching in info* haha I can't believe I'm giving out my number to a guy who starts a conversation with "What's your favorite Subway sandwich" haha
*Ding*
_____________
Has worked everytime cept this once because bitch was deaf... but if i knew sign language then it wouldve been on an poppin.
Fux wit me!
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