May 2, 2009 @ 02:06 AM

Post: 1424

Join Date: Nov 2006

Location: So CaL

ok so this whole hype on the swine flu is ridiculous...

i mean i honestly didnt care about it until i read this...
part of it tells me not to worry or that its bs...
but another part tells me what if we experience some left 4 dead shxt?
May 2, 2009 @ 03:09 AM

Post: 492

Join Date: Mar 2008

Location: New Zealand/MN

After death, this virus is able to restart the heart of it
May 2, 2009 @ 03:12 AM

Post: 495

Join Date: Mar 2009

Location: Bay Area

Swine flu aint shit, its just media hype trying to make it into some huge terror to give the government an excuse to further breech our rights.
May 2, 2009 @ 03:20 AM

Post: 4413

Join Date: Aug 2007

Location: somewhere, over the...

I am writing this from a fully and completely realistic point of view, I add none of the frivolous magical properties of a ghoul or zombie, and disregard the illogical completely. The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks, takes the first part of the book explaining the virus “Solanum,” and I am going to work off of that idea, using the same name. It is that concept alone that I am working with; that it is a virus. All other concepts are completely scientifically based and we will explore the possibility that a virus such as Solanum exists in nature and that it has the ability to infect a hosts brain cells (neurons), first by entering the circulatory system via bodily fluid interaction of an infected individual and an uninfected individual, and finally making its way to the neuronal cells and manipulating said cells. I will disregard the communicability of 100 percent used in the book in favor of a more realistic number, 99.4 percent as used in The Stand by Stephen King for a man-made virus (given that that is the most likely scenario for the creation of this virus). Critics may say that this is not a “zombie” contingency plan, and to them I say nay, it depends on your definition of “zombie.” Plus, I find the idea of realism much more horrifying than fiction. Fiction you can brush off as being something implausible… The following may be fiction, but it is very plausible.

Skip this if you don’t give a fuck about biology:

In order to realistically write a zombie contingency plan, one must have knowledge of how a zombie functions in order to exploit their weaknesses and predict their attacks. I am telling everybody right fucking now, the anatomy of the zombies outlined in The Zombie Survival Guide is impossible. The zombies would disintegrate, with cells lysing on a scale so grand that there is no way they could eat you/pass on the virus before turning into a pile of mush, let alone have the capacity of movement. Therefore, I am about to discredit any possibility in the known world for a human body to function without the proper systems in place. A virus is considered “pseudoliving” which means that it is not technically alive by the standards of science. Without the host cells machinery, a virus cannot grow or replicate. Thus, a virus must take control of the host cells machinery and use that machinery to create its own DNA and subsequent proteins. This hinges on one very important point, the cell must function as it has always functioned. It needs glucose, fat or protein to begin the aerobic respiration that uses oxygen as a final electron acceptor in the path to making ATP (energy) to run the metabolic processes of the cell.

The implications of this are great, the zombie has to have working lungs to bring oxygen into the system, working circulatory system to transfer said oxygen along with nutrients and wastes, and systems which can eliminate said wastes. This brings into light the very real weaknesses of the zombie. It must be “living” for all intents and purposes, but that does not mean it will be easy to kill. Here’s the kicker: The virus can manipulate the cells. The neuronal cells that stop replicating in adult humans are once again capable of regeneration, a virus can lie dormant in a cell for very long periods of time (as evidenced by HIV, which progresses into AIDs once the virus decides to lyse the cells releasing the virus into the system) and make the cell replicate with viral DNA in the nucleus creating hundreds of cells with viral DNA in them. This means the virus will make the neuronal cells replicate, creating millions of new neurons each with viral DNA in them, each with the ability to control more of the processes of the human brain. One may also imply that the zombie is much smarter than your average human being, with a larger number of neuronal cells capable of propagating larger numbers of signals at a faster speed. I contest the idea that zombies are stumbling creatures with an off-kilter gate and little hand-eye coordination.

I believe that this hypothetical virus would create extremely intelligent humans which it would have full control over, by producing the proteins and enzymes of its own DNA rather than that of the original cell, it would be fully plausible that the human infected with this virus would be controlled by the desires of the virus, which would be to infect new hosts. Also, the infected individual would not be the same person they were in their lives with everything from memories to basic wants and desires being manipulated and changed by the virus. The zombie would also have a heightened set of sensory systems, and it’s plausible that the neural signals from their external body are blocked by the virus in the CNS, reducing and possibly eliminating the effects of pain or touch sensation. Furthermore, they may act with a hive mentality, working towards a common goal (and remember, they’re smart), and their circulatory system may be routed in order to increase the amount of blood to the muscles, increasing their strength and agility. The most horrific realization: They may look completely normal. The virus does not necessarily impact their vocal chords, and they would look like a regular human being. Their behavior would be notably different, but they could pass the virus on before the realization of what has happened is fully recognized.

Contingency Plan

With this knowledge in place, we can begin to determine what will and what will not work. Quarantines will be key in containing the virus to large areas (in the range of regions to complete countries). Given our inability to distinguish the zombies from the humans, large quarantine areas will be key. All air and sea ports should be shut down, and control of the army and air bases is essential. A 99.4 percent communicable virus can most likely become airborne, especially since viral particles are pseudoliving and can enter a dormant stage if not active in a cell (such is the case when they are housed within a water molecule, such as on a humid day). Dry climates are best due to such conditions, especially since a zombie lacks any other desire than to pass on its virus and thus does not drink, dehydration would be a good way to defeat them. Other ways to kill the zombies via natural causes would be to expose them to harsh environmental conditions, such as the extreme hot or cold, high saline, low/high pH and anoxic environments all fit the bill. Thus, the best areas to flee to would be the deserts, the higher and lower altitudes and the poles. The worst places would be the mountains, valleys, jungles and tropics.

Also, since they are human we can kill them if it comes down to that. We would want to see them coming given that a more intelligent being would outsmart us in a terrain war using the mountains or valleys. The plains and deserts are ideal for such a situation. Saskatchewan, where you can watch your dog run away for three days, is a good place to be for a zombie apocalypse. This is where the plan gets sleazy and corrupt. We need to get rid of these zombies before they kill us all, and we have to do it in a way that causes the least amount of damage, least bloodshed (especially into the water systems; I’ll say it again, viruses are pseudoliving, they can live in the soil and water forever until it attaches to a host cell whose machinery it can manipulate) and the most successful. Thus we will need two plans, one for “the bait” and one for “the survivors.” You’re reading the survivors guide. The bait will be those that believe a virus can evoke a stage of being “undead” in which these things cannot be killed and the mountains and valleys should be used to hide from and trick them.

The survivors guide is for those that know these fuckers are smarter than us, and would kick our ass in a terrain based war of wit. Trust me, this is necessary. Think of the people we could get to follow the bait guide? Bush, Hannah Montana, the Jonas Brothers, etc. Man, I’m beginning to WELCOME the zombie apocalypse. Anyways, we can lure the zombies into the valleys and mountains, from there dams can be taken out and landslides created provided we still have control of the army bases (I thank you Wright brothers). Meanwhile, safe zones can be created and established in areas where the weather would kill any remaining zombies in a disposable manner (such as through freezing, and might I add that if you freeze a zombie it would be much like freezing a human, where the plasma and extra/intracellular fluid freezes into crystals which would tear the cells apart resulting in death). Due to the high communicability, the zombie bodies will have to be destroyed, I’m thinking a controlled nuclear blast in the areas the zombies were lured to. Fire is a good way to kill a virus, since even the pseudoliving cannot deny the destructive powers of heat to proteins which make up their outer coat. Thus, to the areas where any remaining zombies fled to and eventually died due to extreme environmental conditions, let the forest fires reign.

Note: this plan is kind of geared toward North and South America following the quarantine, it can be applied to Europe as well. Japan, if they got hit with this virus, they’re kind of screwed. Britain, you’re screwed. Australia… well you guys have all that poisonous stuff, so I’m pretty sure the zombies are afraid of you. China, fucking nuke them if this happens, because with that high of a population they are fucked. Canada, Russia and the Scandinavian countries will pull through nicely, and the US, if you guys don’t go all batshit on me, you’ll be alright (I’m talking to you Utah, you and your Mormons, lol.)

shits aint gunna happen, but we can still play games about it though
May 2, 2009 @ 03:24 AM

Post: 17

Join Date: May 2009

Swine flu isn't shit. Almost all of the people who have that shit recover fine, you only have to REALLY worry if you're a baby of if you're old. How many hundreds of thousands of people die each year from the regular damn flu, and how FEW have actually died from swine flu? Hardly any. People will have unprotected sex and not worry about aids but these fools wont walk outside without a mask on. SMH @ society. It's all media hype.

Oh and I call BS on the news story, that shits gotta be a joke. Not legit at all.
May 2, 2009 @ 03:25 AM
Jim Jardashian

Post: 3900

Join Date: Aug 2007

May 2, 2009 @ 03:37 AM


Post: 9813

Join Date: Oct 2007

Location: 707//HK

idk the closest representation of zombie that is actually realistic is from quarantine.. it was an advanced form of rabies that was created by a doomsday cult...

it like infected people hella fast.

Forum Administrator • @DREWKKAKE

May 2, 2009 @ 03:42 AM

Post: 17

Join Date: May 2009

idk the closest representation of zombie that is actually realistic is from quarantine.. it was an advanced form of rabies that was created by a doomsday cult...

it like infected people hella fast.

Damn, I literally just watched this for the first time the other day. That shit was NUTS, real believable too. I thought it was gonna be terrible but it turned out pretty good.

I definitely think some shit like zombies is possible, but it's not this swine flu bullshit that's for sure.
May 2, 2009 @ 07:55 AM

Post: 605

Join Date: Jul 2008

Location: radda

I am legend rabies seems possible to me

radda radda radda

May 2, 2009 @ 08:03 AM

Post: 4219

Join Date: Aug 2006

Location: Kingsbridge BX NYC

May 2, 2009 @ 09:12 AM

Post: 1243

Join Date: Nov 2008

nice pic, nice tits

May 2, 2009 @ 02:32 PM

Post: 624

Join Date: Mar 2008

Location: Toronto

The link is fake.. be smarter. There was literally a topic about this the other day.

Here is that other topic

May 2, 2009 @ 02:46 PM

Post: 3957

Join Date: Jan 2009

I'd beat the shit outta swine flu.
May 2, 2009 @ 03:20 PM
Bill B.

Post: 727

Join Date: Sep 2008

Location: Philly

I'm too fast for swine flu. That shit can't catch me.
May 2, 2009 @ 03:34 PM

Post: 446

Join Date: Jun 2008


It isnt BBC
May 2, 2009 @ 07:04 PM

Post: 231

Join Date: Dec 2008

lmao @ this thing reaching the 2nd page.
May 2, 2009 @ 07:49 PM
Benny Lava

Post: 1927

Join Date: Sep 2006

Location: Los Angeles

this is what i thought of when i saw thread title.

Supreme x Nike SB Tennis Classic

May 2, 2009 @ 10:05 PM
The Robe

Post: 271

Join Date: Sep 2008

Location: Chicago, IL

I kind of want to get swine flu. I would go to school and cough on all these people.
May 3, 2009 @ 01:54 AM

Post: 1131

Join Date: Nov 2008

Dont believe the hype.
But I got a zombie plan...just in case

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