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October 27, 2009 @ 01:38 PM
It's Only Hype

Post: 5495

Join Date: Jan 2008



My tissue game was fucked up and i didn't cover my nostril all the way and a huge ass booger flies onto her shoulder. I was like FUCK. I didn't want to wipe it cuz there woulda been a stain and she woulda noticed and I woulda been fucked, but on the other hand I was fucked cuz she was gonna see a giant ass booger on her shoulder.




ahhh gross.



.... Come to find out she was missing an arm


funny shit. glad she was a sport about it
February 14, 2010 @ 03:46 AM
Auguste

Post: 2088

Join Date: Jun 2009

Location: LA

need moar lulz

I had taken the words out of his mouth and filled it with fart.

February 14, 2010 @ 01:19 PM
northwest

Post: 4033

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

thanks for bumping always got mad lulz from it.
February 14, 2010 @ 02:38 PM
SWAGteam

Post: 192

Join Date: Apr 2009

We used to have get togethers every night at my house when everyone was still single. Last year, there was a random night when only me and another friend were free so she and I ended up getting faded, just the two of us. We were tired so we were in the living room heavy eyed watching Anaconda. I put my arm around her, cuz heck, I did it all the time, she was really cute for a lesbian. She asks me to lie down so she can get comfortable, so I did. I was starting to close my eyes when suddenly I feel her finger circling my nipple. I was like, WTF? Well, to speed this up, we ended up making out, then staggering to my room, where I eventually convinced her to get naked. I couldn't get hard cuz I was drunk so I went down on her for like almost an hour. She was talking dirty to me the whole time going "you like eating pussy? you like it?" in her boyish-sounding voice. AWKWARD since she's one of my best friends. The whole time I was frantically wishing I got hard, so Im pretty sure she caught on to that and didn't cum the whole time. What sucks is that she's heard me say "I have a big dick," in the past, but it's so not the case when I'm flaccid! After it was all done, I looked like a dumbass who can't lick pussy and has a small dick; the opposite of what I'm supposed to have a reputation for. She just straight up left. I felt like I was the girl who got used, LOL. So I still see her all the time and still are good friends. No one knows about what happened that night within my friends, but till this day, I can't make a "big dick" comment without catching eye contact with her and feeling awkward and useless. Sometimes I like to randomly make comments about stuff that only I would know too, just to make her feel awkward, like, "yeah her tits are actually big when they're not bound by those damn tight sportsbras she wears, or " I bet you have small nipples."
February 14, 2010 @ 02:50 PM
It's Only Hype

Post: 5495

Join Date: Jan 2008

damn erectile dysfunction and shit
February 14, 2010 @ 02:55 PM
ahgeadf

Post: 635

Join Date: Aug 2009

We used to have get togethers every night at my house when everyone was still single. Last year, there was a random night when only me and another friend were free so she and I ended up getting faded, just the two of us. We were tired so we were in the living room heavy eyed watching Anaconda. I put my arm around her, cuz heck, I did it all the time, she was really cute for a lesbian. She asks me to lie down so she can get comfortable, so I did. I was starting to close my eyes when suddenly I feel her finger circling my nipple. I was like, WTF? Well, to speed this up, we ended up making out, then staggering to my room, where I eventually convinced her to get naked. I couldn't get hard cuz I was drunk so I went down on her for like almost an hour. She was talking dirty to me the whole time going "you like eating pussy? you like it?" in her boyish-sounding voice. AWKWARD since she's one of my best friends. The whole time I was frantically wishing I got hard, so Im pretty sure she caught on to that and didn't cum the whole time. What sucks is that she's heard me say "I have a big dick," in the past, but it's so not the case when I'm flaccid! After it was all done, I looked like a dumbass who can't lick pussy and has a small dick; the opposite of what I'm supposed to have a reputation for. She just straight up left. I felt like I was the girl who got used, LOL. So I still see her all the time and still are good friends. No one knows about what happened that night within my friends, but till this day, I can't make a "big dick" comment without catching eye contact with her and feeling awkward and useless. Sometimes I like to randomly make comments about stuff that only I would know too, just to make her feel awkward, like, "yeah her tits are actually big when they're not bound by those damn tight sportsbras she wears, or " I bet you have small nipples."


www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cUNNKzj_Nc&feature=related
February 14, 2010 @ 03:17 PM
Guapamole

Post: 3956

Join Date: Jan 2009

So I have to take a leaky/diarrhea shit so I decide to go in my parent's room and do so while watching tv. So after im finished i attempt to flush the toilet only realizing that I forgot that it was still broken. So proceed to grab a cup and scoop out the poop water and dump it into my toilet. I make around 20 trips of this while my parents are in the next room watching a movie. I think of this moment overtime a toilet becomes clogged now.
February 14, 2010 @ 03:19 PM
Soldier187

Post: 689

Join Date: Aug 2009

I almost trip with people just looking and I act calmly as if nothing ever happened.
February 14, 2010 @ 03:35 PM
northwest

Post: 4033

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

no more bowel-movement stories!!! omfg
February 14, 2010 @ 03:38 PM
Juicy J

Post: 1422

Join Date: Jun 2009

Location: Memphis

So many lol's.

One time when I was about 7 or 8 and in elementary school, I had a weak bladder. And the class I was in was wayyyy out in a trailer separated from the rest of the school. So I would have to take like a 5 minute walk from my class, and my stomach was acting up bad. So I ran from the trailer to the school, and I could feel that shit sliding out with every step. So I get in the bathroom and there's shit everywhere at that point. It's like in the back of my shoes, on the ground of the bathroom, everywhere. And the bell was about to ring to go home, so I did my best to clean up quickly and left what I didn't have time to clean. So I run out the bathroom to catch the bus, and I run into this old black janitor. He just stands there and says, "I know what did in there boy." I took off running and didn't look back.



So im graduating from college...and in my engineering class we have a reflect class in which we look back at the past four year. We was told to bring pics, videos,ext. I broke my jump drive a week prior and had to use my older brother usb card. So its my turn to show off my pics and about 2 mins into the slide show a video of my older bro getting head comes on this big ass projection screen!! Note: Me and my bro are identical. Lol


*dead*

WE TRIPPY MANE

February 14, 2010 @ 04:33 PM
MeroWavy

Post: 387

Join Date: Apr 2009

so i went thru this whole thread...
a lot of stories are about poop
but this jst happened as i was reading


my lil cousin walked in speaking in tongues like she was the lil ethiopian boy from southpark
awkward...?
February 14, 2010 @ 04:34 PM
young idiot

Post: 6150

Join Date: Oct 2008

Location: London

^ kill her
February 14, 2010 @ 04:53 PM
JesusHadDreads

Post: 1147

Join Date: Jan 2010

Location: 904 Florida

One time when I was really little my dad and I were at the grocery store. I close my eyes, start spining around and hug my dad saying "I love you daddy!". I open my eyes, look up...and it's not my dad just some white guy with an akward smirk on his face. I look over at my dad and he's like "im over here", and I run over like aint shit happened.

When ever my dad comes in my room to tell me something he opens the door, looks around my room, talks to me then stares at my computer screen as he leaves.
February 14, 2010 @ 09:32 PM
toekneekey

Post: 68

Join Date: Sep 2009

In grade 2, I remember we were having this reading circle where the teacher would read to us. A big ass bee flew right into our class and starts chasing me, I ran all around the class and hid under the table and shit stll followed me. haha I remember the teacher telling me to just calm down it wont sting you. Yeah, basically the whole class just laughed at me while I was scared shitless
February 14, 2010 @ 09:49 PM
1234

Post: 1643

Join Date: Jan 2007

Location: toronto

i was in neighborhood store in the summer in hong kong, and I was buying this t-shirt.when me and my cousin was about to leave a bunch of cool kids and girlfriend comes in. they come in, and while we passed them, they were checking out what i was wearing. as they do, i walk right into the glass door cause the very front is divided intro 3 glass panels, only the middle one is a door, but i thought they were double doors. so shame, I continued walking as if nothing, but i'm sure they were laughing, cause if i saw tHAT i woulda laughed.

this one time i was writing this exam, this weird kid that look like he's 10 sits beside me. then in the middle of the exam, he had the loudest fart i've ever heard. it was a auditorium style room, so the sound echoed too. i quickly moved farter away, and noticed everyone looking, including the prof.
February 14, 2010 @ 10:52 PM
Joweee

Post: 3667

Join Date: Jul 2008

it was a new semester and this chick just came into our spanish class. After school a couple days later me and my homie get a ride from our homie who is her homie. so i sit in the middle and on the way home i turn to my friend and say "i'd fuck the girl next to me mayne". He looks at me and looks away. I get a text saying "you know that was loud as fuck right?" I just look up and out the window. She sat right next to me for that semester. Fucked up my chances........
February 14, 2010 @ 10:54 PM
It's Only Hype

Post: 5495

Join Date: Jan 2008


this one time i was writing this exam, this weird kid that look like he's 10 sits beside me. then in the middle of the exam, he had the loudest fart i've ever heard. it was a auditorium style room, so the sound echoed too. i quickly moved farter away, and noticed everyone looking, including the prof.



i lold @ farter
February 14, 2010 @ 11:27 PM
northwest

Post: 4033

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

^
me too
mad lulz
February 14, 2010 @ 11:39 PM
Jackson12

Post: 364

Join Date: Aug 2009

Location: Ottawa

was watching cheaters uncensored with my dad while wearing pyjama bottoms. the two people start fucking on hidden camera like full out porn fucking and i popped a boner, then my dad told me get up and turn off the dvd player... got up and tried to angle my rod away from him and flicked that shit off and ran upstairs.
February 14, 2010 @ 11:55 PM
It's Only Hype

Post: 5495

Join Date: Jan 2008

was watching cheaters uncensored with my dad while wearing pyjama bottoms. the two people start fucking on hidden camera like full out porn fucking and i popped a boner, then my dad told me get up and turn off the dvd player... got up and tried to angle my rod away from him and flicked that shit off and ran upstairs.


hahaha
February 15, 2010 @ 05:07 PM
Jackson12

Post: 364

Join Date: Aug 2009

Location: Ottawa

i was like 17 at the time also
February 15, 2010 @ 06:10 PM
rey

Post: 105

Join Date: Jul 2009

Location: Canada

getting it on with your best friend(girl btw) and if that's not akward enough, my friend calls and asks me if i'm doing "that chick with nice tits", did she hear it? oh yes.
February 15, 2010 @ 06:49 PM
Beez

Post: 3724

Join Date: Sep 2006

Location: Bay Area, CA

last night, holding in coughs throughout the ENTIRE movie in a packed theater with a homegirl watching with me on one side and then some old dude sitting on the other side.

then after, getting out and going in an elevator with one girl by herself and then watching all these couples flooding in.

twitter @brandohnn findme. injc*

February 15, 2010 @ 09:56 PM
B.M.

Post: 791

Join Date: Aug 2009

Location: Filadelfia

I was at a party and I had some weed on me but no smoking instruments. This one babe gives me her keys because she had blunts in her car. So I leave and hop into her car, the door was unlocked so I threw the keychain around my neck and proceeded to search for the Games. While looking I notice this is more a manly car. Turns out I was lurking around some random dudes Ford while his brightly lit house sat right next to me. Thank god he didnt come out the crib.

"I got smokers hitting rocks making Stevie J faces" - Quilly

February 16, 2010 @ 12:13 AM
Freddie Benson

Post: 2714

Join Date: Jul 2007

popped a boner watching icarly

anal del rey http://yellow-stuff.com

February 16, 2010 @ 12:33 AM
soulamazing.

Post: 5498

Join Date: Jan 2008

Location: Adverse City.

This thread's hilarious.
February 16, 2010 @ 12:38 AM
young idiot

Post: 6150

Join Date: Oct 2008

Location: London

popped a boner watching icarly


who provoked this blood diversion?
February 16, 2010 @ 01:03 AM
lolwut

Post: 257

Join Date: Feb 2009

damm. mine didnt happen to me but anyhow

So, i was at my college one day talking to the homies and i see this one plump mexican chick walking down this hill/path. I think she was texting or some shit and she goes off the course of the hill/path and on the sides are rocks lol. so she falls and her shin goes right into a rock. All the while none of my friends werent looking and i started to bust out laughing and shit cuz it was hella funny. she did one of those peter griffin hurt knee sighs(www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkudqkDvu6s) She gets up after a minute, does one of those limp walks and sits on a bench that just so happened to be right there. next thing u know she starts crying.... i still laughed but i felt like a dick after
February 16, 2010 @ 09:23 AM
FillUp703

Post: 47

Join Date: Jul 2009

Location: VA

in my dorm we have a janitor room that we steal napkins and other stuff from. one time we ran out so i walked over to get some more. i opened the door and a janitor was staring directly at me (swear it was like a good five seconds). so i proceed to slam the door and run off.
February 16, 2010 @ 11:01 AM
young idiot

Post: 6150

Join Date: Oct 2008

Location: London

^ lol scrubs

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