Awkward/Weird Situations Thread

August 11, 2012 @ 03:22 AM
cormilk

Post: 424

Join Date: Apr 2012

Location: flockaville

In 2nd grade I had to take a piss really bad but my teacher Ms. Jordan wouldn't let me ( she's black and I'm hispanic so I thought she was racist) so since I didn't have the courage to run to the bathroom and drain the main vain, took a mean ass piss right there and then... funny thing is, I blamed it on the special ed kid that sat in my seat before me that day, everyone believed it, plus I was wearing dark pants so kids didn't know I took that leak... but since I rode the school bus, had to sit in dick juice for about 3 hours til I could change clothes back at home...

This other time, my friend caught me and his mom in the middle of some foot fetish, kind of weird turning around with his mom's feet in my mouth as he stares at me with high disappoint and all mind baffled, I always wondered what his mom told him after that... shit has not been the same with my dude #pause but she was worth it


My nigga the fuck is going on in that second story? You gotta explain that shit better.
Aight my nigga relax this is how i happened..... This one time she was getting ready to going out, and she asked me how she looked, and I said you look gorgeous from head to toe and I pointed out how her nails look nice and all that... which later on when she had came back from wherever she went out, ( crashed at friend's house, dude was asleep) she said she was tired and that her feet hurt... so as we talked ahout what we did that day, I pervertedly made my way to her bedroom and I told her I can give her a foot massage if she liked and so then (pause I got boner) I kissed her feet and went into full foot fetish, minus jacking my dick off with her soles, I don't dig that... so after all this foreplay my homeboy walks into the bedroom like " Hey Mom where did you put......" *dat silence* and then yeah u know the rest...

how old were you when that happened ? That shit would of easily turned into some ass should of locked the door

August 21, 2012 @ 07:03 PM
mathewjones

Post: 55

Join Date: Aug 2012

When my mom throws me the remote and it lands on my groin area haha
August 21, 2012 @ 08:45 PM
RAREakuma

Post: 424

Join Date: Jun 2012

8th grade.

I was crackin jokes all of french class, and it was the day of a presentation. So the teacher, trying to get back at me, tells me to go up front. I try to motion to her that I'm a little too excited, and I feel the boner coming on, but she won't listen. So there's to bitches up front just staring at my dick rise while I try and give a presentation, my french teacher is just laughing the whole time, that fucking cunt. I can't even focus as the spaghetti falls out of my pocket.

Same shit happens in choir class a month or so later, but it's with one of the same bitches from before, plus this other girl who had some big ass titties for an 8th grader. So I'm singing and shit, and the boner rises, and this time it's worse cause I'm in gym shorts, and the other girl (one of the ones from before) sees my dick and is like "oh my god...". I go to the restroom and literally just wait at the stall until I can take a piss. I talked to her recently and she said that was the first dick she ever saw, and that she was a little scared, but had a crush on me the rest of 8th grade cool . Too bad the bitch was ugly jafeel.

Skinny as a fuck, still eatin' the food. http://hypebeast.com/forums/apparel/177620/

August 22, 2012 @ 08:42 PM
Major

Post: 433

Join Date: Jun 2012

Location: New York

When my mom throws me the remote and it lands on my groin area haha

0/10
August 23, 2012 @ 01:44 AM
slammedb5

Post: 98

Join Date: Jun 2011

So I'm a movie theater manager and I handle customer complaints multiple times every shift but I just had the worst encounter in years. During the week we have discount days in order to bring in people and Wednesday is the senior discount day. Hope springs is the popular movie for seniors this week and since its in a small theater it gets pretty packed. Mind you older folks do tend to have unpleasant scents especially when a bunch are in close proximity. But one customer in particular ha thee worst BO I have ever smelled and I had to hear at least 5 separate complaints about the guy. So with that many complaints I had no choice but to try and remove him from the theater. I felt bad having to kick out a guy and give him passes to come back all because he smelled like a rancid butthole. Hopefully he washes himself before returning.
August 23, 2012 @ 01:46 AM
MUSASHI

Post: 761

Join Date: Jan 2012

Location: SJ

So I'm a movie theater manager and I handle customer complaints multiple times every shift but I just had the worst encounter in years. During the week we have discount days in order to bring in people and Wednesday is the senior discount day. Hope springs is the popular movie for seniors this week and since its in a small theater it gets pretty packed. Mind you older folks do tend to have unpleasant scents especially when a bunch are in close proximity. But one customer in particular ha thee worst BO I have ever smelled and I had to hear at least 5 separate complaints about the guy. So with that many complaints I had no choice but to try and remove him from the theater. I felt bad having to kick out a guy and give him passes to come back all because he smelled like a rancid butthole. Hopefully he washes himself before returning.

HAHAHAH dead at rancid butthole

“Perceive that which cannot be seen with the eye.”

August 23, 2012 @ 02:31 AM
Panther.

Post: 1628

Join Date: Apr 2012

Location: ’هشةه

I was taking a shit at school one time, and this nigga runs into the bathroom bangin on the door and yellin at me to come out cuz he has to take a shit and the other stall is closed off. I tell him nah,and he's gonna have to wait. So about 15 seconds later i hear gruntin and shit, so i try my best to ignore it till im done......I get out the stall to see this nigga takin a shit in the urinal.

suprised

holy fuck im deaded

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

August 23, 2012 @ 03:16 AM
iAmSofaKing

Post: 1492

Join Date: Jun 2011

Location: Toronto

Had this black co worker who looked like Lupe Fiasco, me and all my other co worker legit thought he was retarted. He would bum smokes off customers and other co workers. And you never see him on his shift, hes always just chilling in the smoke area outside.

One time he came up to me asking me how much money i had on me, i said "like 2 dollars" he goes "can you buy me a hot dog?" Im thinking in my head you can afford 50 cent hot dogs nigga? This other time he goes up to my co worker and asks if he can take a bite out of his hot dog.

Two incidents with drinks, my work provides us with cups so we can get refills at the fountain. One time this idiot asks if he can take a sip out of my drink. I said cups were free. And this other time as my Chinese co worker is walking in from break he sees this guy taking a sip out of his cup. He goes "what the hell man that my cup!". Funniest shit in my life. The idiot got fired 1 week after he got hired

Sorry i couldnt put it in a funnier way.

For Sale: Large Navy Supreme Floral Polo WTB: Medium Black Supreme Roses Football Top

September 4, 2012 @ 01:59 PM
♥♥♥♥☮☮☮☮☮♥♥♥♥♥⚐⚑☺☺☺

Post: 1566

Join Date: Jul 2012

Location: Pretty boy central

Jacked off to mom porn this morning, didn't know it was, halfway in. couldn't go back

Fml.

Hansumboy killa Pretty bitch basedfam http://hypebeast.com/forums/apparel/200320 http://hypebeast.com/forums/apparel/200320

September 5, 2012 @ 06:42 AM
dyelawn

Post: 60

Join Date: Oct 2008

Location: MPLS YO!

College roommate called when he got my number from the school the other day and after he told me who he was I said "sup" and he was like "nice to meet you too". That's just a bit but the whole conversation was stupid awkward.
September 5, 2012 @ 07:02 AM
veryrareandbased

Post: 1700

Join Date: Aug 2012

Location: The Trap

That awkward moment when I was about to go for a goodbye hug to this cute girl and I decked her with the brim of my hat..right in her eye. fml

#HANSUMBOYZ / "I mean I just wanted the pussy tbh."- Thad #FREETHAD

September 5, 2012 @ 07:19 AM
Jim Jardashian

Post: 3885

Join Date: Aug 2007

Location: Jermany Shore

You a short ass fuck
September 5, 2012 @ 07:27 AM
veryrareandbased

Post: 1700

Join Date: Aug 2012

Location: The Trap

You a short ass fuck

haha. naw it was actually inside the car when i was about to do it. makes it even worse.

#HANSUMBOYZ / "I mean I just wanted the pussy tbh."- Thad #FREETHAD

September 5, 2012 @ 07:39 AM
Principal Buttsavage

Post: 297

Join Date: Sep 2009

Location: La Jolla, CA

Lol I got a couple but they kind of make me seem like an asshole.

I was at the airport at the beginning of the summer and I got a drink from one of the stores in the gate area. I put my drink in one of the side drink pockets on my backpack and apparently i didnt screw the top on good enough and the drink started leaking when i put my bag in the chair. So im sitting there for about five minutes and when i get my drink for another sip, i see a huge puddle of sweet tea in the seat next to me. As I'm looking at it, I notice a woman who noticed me spill all this shit. It was early as hell and I didn't feel like cleaning it up so like a dumbass, I just try to casually walk away cause I wasn't even at my gate (the airport was packed as shit). So as I'm trying to escape the woman is just screaming " HEY! HEY! YOU'RE NOT GONNA CLEAN THIS UP! HEY!" So now all these people are looking at me when I try to awkwardly jog off. So I just went to some random gate, put on my headphones and faked sleeping until i my time to board. In retrospect I should've just cleaned it up and not been a lazy asshole but whatever.

So I'm walking around the dorms on campus and theres this blind guy that lives in the dorms. Anyway, I'm coming up to a turn on the sidewalk and he's coming the other direction to where I'm about to turn and I know he's about to turn my direction because his dorm is that way. I can already tell this is gonna be awkward cause there isn't enough room for both of us to make this turn because he's waving his cane on the sidewalk. Also theres bushes so i can't just walk off the sidewalk. So as I get up to him at the turn, I just jumped his cane like I was dodging a sword swipe or something and kept it moving. I still wonder if he even knew I was there.
September 5, 2012 @ 09:15 AM
filthavenue

Post: 1243

Join Date: Dec 2010

Location: vancouver

Pretty sure he knew. You'd be surprised what blind people can sense.

http://filthavenue.tumblr.com/

September 5, 2012 @ 01:58 PM
oneallah

Post: 1265

Join Date: Mar 2012

Location: in yo closet

that awkward moment when you find yourself waking up in a tigers cage at the zoo and your mom with your friends is laughing at you
January 7, 2013 @ 09:39 PM
It's Only Hype

Post: 4067

Join Date: Jan 2008

that awkward moment when you overhear your neighbor say she got jizz on her foot

The weird thing is, I don't think she has anyone over,

but she does have two dogs tho suprised
January 8, 2013 @ 04:46 AM
Astrobrite

Post: 61

Join Date: May 2012

Probably the most awkward sexual experience I've had in my life.

I used to go to a private k-12 school 45 minutes away from my house so there was a long commute back and forth. One day me and this cute, older jewish girl who I would flirt with on the reg were on the bus with like 5 other kids. Normally the bus was full but today for some reason it wasn't. Typically the older kids sat in the back and the young fucks sat in the front, so me and her were the only people in the back of the bus. I was in 7th grade and she was in 9th. She texted me telling me to come to her seat, and me being the clueless 12/13 year old I was, I asked why? She just texted again saying "just come to my seat". I head over and as soon as my ass hits the seat she grabs at my belt, undoes it, and pulls my pants down. I'm just like "oh shit, what're you doing?" because I was 12, shit like this was my fantasy..couldn't believe it was actually happening. She responds with something like "you're so fun to talk to and cute, I've been wanting to do this for a while" or some corny shit like that and proceeds to fucking straight up grab my dick and jerk it. I'm like cool and try to settle in, imagining what it'll be like to finally bust on a bitch. She asks to switch seats because she does it better with her left hand or something. It was weird.

Have in mind that this was a private school, so she was dressed like a fucking school girl and everything down to a tee. Shit was straight out of a porn flick. She tells me to finger her through the shorts under her skirt, so I'm thinking hell yeah, I'm finally touching some pussy this is the best day of my life. I started doing it and she started moaning, which freaked me out so I stopped. Partially because because I didn't wanna get caught being loud, and partially because I just didn't know wtf to do the shit was intense and I was 12/13. After I stop she just keeps going....and going......and going.....and going. Honestly it was the worst handjob I've ever had in my life, my shit was in pain.

After like 25 minutes I told her to stop and that it was cool, I just didn't want to do it on the bus....knowing damn well that shit was garbage. The bitch was a freak though, there was this little 4th grade girl who she hated on the bus. After I got off at my stop, she texted me and told me she made the girl high five her with the jackoff/precum hand. Just nasty. Worst is that the little girl was my little sister's friend and she would always be at my house, I was always reminded that at one point in time my cum was in her hands. I saw her the next day and shit was hella awkward then, and for the rest of the school year when we rode the bus together and all the other kids were on. Whenever we talked or made eye contact I could feel that sexual tension....shit was too intense for a kid as young as I was.

I switched schools 2 years later and one day she randomly hit me up and we started talking. I brought the incident up about how she was my first taste and how disappointed I was jokingly and she was cool and joked along also. Shit, I should hit her up today.

Shit was sooooo awkward back then though. 25 minute epic awkward handjob story.
January 8, 2013 @ 06:09 AM
bjornvan

Post: 445

Join Date: Sep 2012

man I got a crapload of awkward situations lol

I had the runs so I took a huge shit in the morning at home before school and I had on some silk boxers...Went to school (8th grade ) it was last period.I went to sit at my desk and it was this bitch sitting behind me, and back then I use to sag my pants so my ass was all out and she got a big whiff as my ass as im sitting down and she yells eww you smell like throw-up ! extra loud and she was like one of them quiet students.Everybody starts to laugh at me,I was a class clown so I said some dumb shit to try to save face . I think I said I sat in something and my teacher (cool black dude mid 20's) was like naw nigga you need to wash yo ass..He always play basketball with me and my friends after school so like for the remainder of the school year he always brought that shit up while we playing basketball lool
At first I thought damn I might have been smelling like shit all day but i remembered I had P.E before that class and the sweat and all that ...
Never wore silk boxers again.I cleaned my ass thoroughly but them silk boxer multiplied the remaining stench by 100

edit":
another one
back in highschool there was this abandoned house ( well not abandoned
but for sell but the locks was broke) that people use to skip
school/class/ bust down bust-downs in.So I skipped class one day by
myself.I went to the house and it was locked but pushed the door hard
and it opened.I was in that bitch smoking on the phone whatever then
these people pull up in the driveway. Im like FUCK!!.So i jumped down
stairs was about to go out back but had tall ass fence, I was about to
go in basement but it was dark and dirty as fuck so I said fuck that.I
ran back up stairs and hid in a closet.I hear them come up stairs they
was talking but I couldnt hear them.But they came in the room and
somebody tried to open the door to the closet I was in but I was holding
the handle.And they pulled hard and it opened by like half a inch and
closed back so they could tell somebody was trying to keep it closed
from the inside.So it goes quiet.I sit for like 10 mins then I leave the
closet.Looked outside  they left so I dipped.And when I was walking out
the neighbor was looking at me at her door step on the phone I was like OH SHIT !so i took the fuck off.
Crazy thing is after I left that school the next year 2 kids got locked up for breaking and entering in one of them houses
January 8, 2013 @ 06:55 AM
012796

Post: 354

Join Date: May 2011

Location: Los Angeles, CA

One time in middle school, I was holding in a big ass fart during class and the teacher made a joke so right when I laughed, I let out a loud and wet ass fart, and the whole class fell silent and looked in my direction. Luckily at that very moment, one of my homies was bending down so I laughed and pointed at him. Nigga was humiliated the whole year for that, never told him it was me aha.

Just last week, I told my friend to park on the side while I ran in the store and grab something real quick. I got my shit and ran out of the store and  jumped into the car and was like "lets go bitch". A big ass black guy turned around and was like "what the fuck you doing in my car?". turns out my friend moved his car and a similar car parked in his place... got the fuck out of the car as quick as i could

EDIT: ANOTHER STORY. I remember when I was little i went to Marshalls with my mom. I'm that kid that likes to fuck around. So I left the area a bit and I came back and saw a woman that looked like my mom pushing a cart. SO the woman leaves the cart unattended and I decide to take the cart with her purse still ont here and scooter with it real quick since I thought it was my moms. I scooter on the shopping cart and the woman runs up yelling "hey that kid is stealing my purse!!!". I stopped and everyone is the store was staring at me. awkwardest moment ever.
January 8, 2013 @ 07:02 AM
HansumBasedFlexDaddy

Post: 352

Join Date: Oct 2012

that awkward moment when you find yourself waking up in a tigers cage at the zoo and your mom with your friends is laughing at you
That awkward moment when you make up a story to get attention from the HB forums.

Hansum + Based = Perfection

January 8, 2013 @ 07:06 AM
$$$$$

Post: 1728

Join Date: May 2011

Location: NY

drunk taking a piss on someone's fence when a car rolls up and someone yells "Yo wassup drunky!" and I replied "haha not much, wassup dudes!" Then I turn around and see two cops walking towards me. sad Now i have court on Valentines Day and two tickets to pay. Oh wellz.
January 8, 2013 @ 07:13 AM
sweettits

Post: 113

Join Date: Oct 2012

First story: Years ago,went to ask out chick, my friend calls her over saying " ___ has something to tell you" , at this point I'm neeeervous to the point where my hand is shaking madly, she comes up to me, and I as I begin to speak, I notice 12 classmates of mine are watching only a few feet away from me, I continue to speak but my voice quivers insanely, so  insanely that I just walked away as people laughed at me and this chick looks at me in confusion

Second Story: I'm about 6 years old at this time,I was in a Barnes&Noble, I was searching around for my mom when I spot this person wearing a jacket almost identical to the one my mom was wearing that same day, her complexity from the back of her head was similar too, I walk up to her, didn't even bother to take a glance at her face, and just laid against her,hugging her for around a good minute until I realize...my mom's not even in this store.. looked up to see her face and...ran the fuck outta there
January 8, 2013 @ 05:00 PM
REVS

Post: 2237

Join Date: Dec 2011

Location: Philadelphia, PA

drunk taking a piss on someone's fence when a car rolls up and someone yells "Yo wassup drunky!" and I replied "haha not much, wassup dudes!" Then I turn around and see two cops walking towards me. Now i have court on Valentines Day and two tickets to pay. Oh wellz.
I remember my first beer.

RIP - Kids DAC. FREE - MFONE, AGANY, MOOK. Now Serving Felonies.

January 8, 2013 @ 05:37 PM
WOADIE

Post: 568

Join Date: Sep 2010

Location: canada

couple years ago i was in cali and i was at some mall with my family to see a movie. so the movie wasnt starting for bout another hour, so i decided to walk around and check shit out. i remember walking around and then i get a whiff of dog shit, so i'm just like what the fuck, why am i smelling dog shit, how come i can't escape this stench? then i find out that someone brought their little bitch made chihuahua  to the mall and let it shit on the ground and never picked it up. i ended stepping in it without noticing, i went to the washroom and managed to remove most of it with toilet paper but the stench was still there. i ended up having to watch the whole movie while sitting there breathing in this dog shit. i dumped a bunch of popcorn on the floor and stepped in it to mask a bit of the smell tho. it was still awkward as fuck 

#Freebandz #Hansum 男の子たちハンサム https://soundcloud.com/woadiieee

January 8, 2013 @ 06:52 PM
*ER!C

Post: 1612

Join Date: May 2008

Location: QUEENS

^lmao at dumping the popcorn
January 9, 2013 @ 12:36 AM
Uranium

Post: 2

Join Date: Dec 2012

I was trying to join a conversation with my friends but they kept talking between each other and i just stood there mouth open like i'm gonna say something. for a solid few minutes. Waiting for the right time to say something. 

I slipped away in embarrassment. sad
January 9, 2013 @ 12:56 AM
DarianaGrande

Post: 3712

Join Date: Jan 2009

Location: Los Angeles

I was chilling with my friend and his girl, recording music and shit. We ask her if she wants to get on a track  to fuck around and she writes some hella depressing emo shit about how she had a miscarriage. Starts crying and tells us about how she fell onto her stomach, went to the bathroom and basically shitted out the baby with the umbilical cord and all. Got quiet as fuck and I just left.  

http://soundcloud.com/anonymousnigger

January 9, 2013 @ 01:04 AM
sweettits

Post: 113

Join Date: Oct 2012

I was trying to join a conversation with my friends but they kept talking between each other and i just stood there mouth open like i'm gonna say something. for a solid few minutes. Waiting for the right time to say something. 

I slipped away in embarrassment. 
Dude that irritates me ( just about everyone) so much, sometimes I wait too long for a right moment that what I was gonna say is not even relevant to the conversation anymore
January 9, 2013 @ 01:17 AM
.kciN

Post: 1389

Join Date: Apr 2010

Location: Paradise

I was chilling with my friend and his girl, recording music and shit. We ask her if she wants to get on a track  to fuck around and she writes some hella depressing emo shit about how she had a miscarriage. Starts crying and tells us about how she fell onto her stomach, went to the bathroom and basically shitted out the baby with the umbilical cord and all. Got quiet as fuck and I just left.  
hahahaha holy shit 
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