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May 8, 2010 @ 07:03 PM
STI Guy

Post: 4516

Join Date: Jan 2007

Location: nyc

i lived in an open double in college. my roommate was doing his girl and they thought i was asleep. i didn't want to make it awkward so i pretended that i was asleep. i tried to fall asleep but i couldn't force myself. i contemplated pretending that i was a sleep walker but i knew that i couldn't have pulled it off walking out without cracking up.
May 8, 2010 @ 09:34 PM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

^
lol i remember that in the college thread
May 15, 2010 @ 12:31 PM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

want to read moar.
May 17, 2010 @ 09:52 PM
biafran

Post: 164

Join Date: Jan 2010

shit happens to me ill go with one guy and he takes me with like 10 dudes/girls i have never seen then he leaves them im there like?wtf and there like uhh who's that so i just call or tell him i gotta go do something and get the hell outta there


story of my life
May 17, 2010 @ 10:02 PM
TRAP MONEY PERM

Post: 578

Join Date: Apr 2010

Location: ATL/NY

Earlier this year, last semester I randomly got a swollen vein or some shit in my fucking nuts...

It hurt like hell, and like a dickhead I thought jacking off would maybe make it go away -_-.

This went one for a few weeks. The awkwardness comes when I had to explain to my mom and grandma about why I needed to go to the doctor.

What was even more awkward/weird was getting a sonogram on my nutsack...Then having to give the doctors note to my Gym Teacher who's a female..

Then over christmas break in NY, having to explain the whole ordeal to my dad...Now he's under the assumption I'm a chronic masturbator.

sad
May 17, 2010 @ 10:13 PM
bullets

Post: 346

Join Date: Jan 2009

Location: Virginia

Okay so i pop mad boners in class like all the time. i am very open about "fixing" or as i call it "Walking the dawg"( when you are wearing hem tight ck briefs and your dick is trying to peirce a hole through, you just let it out from where the your legs go through) , its just awkward when people stare at me.

I had a class with two girls. one of em was my girlfriend and the other one was the girl i was trying to get, and the other girl always sat in my lap (not my gf). it was just awkward every class lol.
May 17, 2010 @ 10:19 PM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

that sounds like bullshit. your girl just tolerated girl #2 to sit on your lap w/o any problems?
May 24, 2010 @ 11:49 PM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

get this back in rotation
May 25, 2010 @ 08:14 AM
SBPRIMO

Post: 4

Join Date: May 2010

I fell asleep in biology class one day and the teacher stopped class and slammed a book on my desk to wake me up. Apparently I was snoring really loud and the person beside me tried to wake me, but failed to do so. Well, when I woke up, I had this huge puddle of drool on my desk. It was all over my face. The teacher made me get up in front of the class and get a paper towel to clean it up. He didn't continue to teach until I was done.
May 25, 2010 @ 08:15 AM
.emaN

Post: 2809

Join Date: Jul 2008

Location: Oregon.

lol one time this girl and i both fell asleep during class haha and so dumb ass teacher decided to evacuate the whole room without us noticing. woke up and everyone was laughing at us haha good times. until i pulled out a glock and sprayed those motherfuckers
May 25, 2010 @ 08:25 PM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

holy fucking shit that wins this thread
June 10, 2010 @ 06:00 PM
JesusHadDreads

Post: 1147

Join Date: Jan 2010

Location: 904 Florida

I was Chill'n with one of my white friends earlier today and he turns to me and goes... "So I was listening to the radio on the way over here, and they had an ad about how eating Watermelon has the same effects of Viagra.... And it got me thinking... Maybe that's why black guys are so big, because they eat so much watermelon!"

Offensive < Gay
June 10, 2010 @ 08:41 PM
Spankbank

Post: 3915

Join Date: Sep 2008

Location: Crooklyn

Was out on a shoot with my friends @ the park, we were sitting down on the bench to chill for a bit. I was adjusting the lens on my camera and at the same time I was looking through the viewfinder and the camera strap was in my face and while I was getting the strap off my face this fat hairy Sasquatch looking dude walks by and thinks I'm taking a picture of him. Right after, he sits next to me and acts like he's a model..... At first it felt awkward as fuck, but I laughed my ass off and walked away.
June 10, 2010 @ 08:48 PM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

hahahahaahha omggggggggggg
June 10, 2010 @ 08:55 PM
Biggums

Post: 121

Join Date: Jan 2010

Location: El dot Ay

Went to my aunt's house to swim in her pool, then I had to take a shit in her bathroom.

For some reason, halfway through the dumpage, I get a raging boner. This is fine until I feel the urge to pee like I usually do while taking a shit. I try to bend myy dick into the bowl but its just too hard. And I can't stand up and turn around because theres a fat turd half way out of my ass.

So basically I piss a fountain of pee straight up into the air and all over my body/floor.
June 10, 2010 @ 09:01 PM
It's Only Hype

Post: 5681

Join Date: Jan 2008

Was out on a shoot with my friends @ the park, we were sitting down on the bench to chill for a bit. I was adjusting the lens on my camera and at the same time I was looking through the viewfinder and the camera strap was in my face and while I was getting the strap off my face this fat hairy Sasquatch looking dude walks by and thinks I'm taking a picture of him. Right after, he sits next to me and acts like he's a model..... At first it felt awkward as fuck, but I laughed my ass off and walked away.


why do I imagine the fat guy from LOST in this scenario. pause.
June 10, 2010 @ 09:04 PM
ClydeFrazier

Post: 6407

Join Date: Feb 2009

I was Chill'n with one of my white friends earlier today and he turns to me and goes... "So I was listening to the radio on the way over here, and they had an ad about how eating Watermelon has the same effects of Viagra.... And it got me thinking... Maybe that's why black guys are so big, because they eat so much watermelon!"

Offensive < Gay


hahaha

*proceeds to eat massive amounts of watermelon*

Melo Gang All Day

June 10, 2010 @ 10:21 PM
Gradient

Post: 118

Join Date: May 2010

Location: im around. .

Went to my aunt's house to swim in her pool, then I had to take a shit in her bathroom.

For some reason, halfway through the dumpage, I get a raging boner. This is fine until I feel the urge to pee like I usually do while taking a shit. I try to bend myy dick into the bowl but its just too hard. And I can't stand up and turn around because theres a fat turd half way out of my ass.

So basically I piss a fountain of pee straight up into the air and all over my body/floor.


haha u r kelly'd urself.coolsmile
June 23, 2010 @ 11:14 PM
biafran

Post: 164

Join Date: Jan 2010

bump
June 23, 2010 @ 11:19 PM
kilogram

Post: 1540

Join Date: Aug 2009

Location: Gaza



why do you think this is funny
June 23, 2010 @ 11:25 PM
Hashy

Post: 473

Join Date: Apr 2010

it is pretty funny IMO
June 24, 2010 @ 12:44 AM
kilogram

Post: 1540

Join Date: Aug 2009

Location: Gaza

wtf i could have sworn he quoted something else
June 24, 2010 @ 01:03 AM
It's Only Hype

Post: 5681

Join Date: Jan 2008

Fap)taps

June 24, 2010 @ 03:47 AM
ulkgood

Post: 1692

Join Date: Mar 2006

Location: San Diego,CA

Friends and I were outside of Ralphs in Downtown SD talking about how one of my homies was pussy whipped. I was talking really loud and 50+ year old white lady walked by as I was saying "Yea she got the pussy on lock." She looked dead at me and I jus like ehhh as she slowly walked by haha.
July 11, 2010 @ 02:13 AM
heeennry

Post: 2106

Join Date: Jun 2009

Location: LA/Iowa

^lol

ok, so I was at BJ's eating with some friends and I went to the restroom to take a leak. I'm in there alone washing my hands and some (drunk confused) guy, in his 50's, walks in. With the corner of my eye I notice that he stopped and was just standing there. I look at him through the mirror and he asks me if my name is "Carlo," it's not. I tell him no and he then proceeds to take a piss in a stall. As I'm drying my hands he yells "What's your name boy?" Without hesitating I told him "John," thats not my real name. Then he laughs and says "What's your REAL name?" I got creeped out and bounced.

I had taken the words out of his mouth and filled it with fart.

July 11, 2010 @ 02:19 AM
northwest

Post: 4034

Join Date: Jul 2006

Location: Seattle, WA

I was with a friend and we were taking a short cut to a train track which happened to pass by the back of a resturant. So we were walking by the back and I started saying all this wankster ass BS to my friend and we were all laughing and shit. Then I look to my left and I see like 5 Vato ass Mexicans on cig breaks just staring at us and I'm like shiiiet and sped up.
July 11, 2010 @ 03:55 AM
KoreanJesus

Post: 1441

Join Date: Jul 2010

Location: $NYC$

It's late at night and I'm jacking at my computer at the top floor of my house. It was hot as fuck so I had the window wide open. All the houses where I live have the pretty much same design. I look left and coincidentally the kid who lives next door is dong the exact same thing. Then he looks right at me through his window. We stared at each other for like one whole minute, I don't remember what happened next but it was so weird.
July 11, 2010 @ 04:32 AM
Gwiz Fin

Post: 233

Join Date: Dec 2007

Location: muzzy

^^ loool

bump
July 11, 2010 @ 04:52 AM
DarianaGrande

Post: 3741

Join Date: Jan 2009

Location: Los Angeles

when i was in the 5th grade i kicked a football in the air and it landed on a teachers face (she was looking up)....she started crying and everyone was looking at me.

http://soundcloud.com/anonymousnigger

July 11, 2010 @ 05:01 AM
brandonicedout

Post: 591

Join Date: Jun 2010

Location: santa monica

My study hall was in the little theater watching a movie. There was a senior class in there to. They were in there for 6A & 6B. Mine was only in there for 6A. I fell asleep cuz it was like pitch black watching this boring ass movie. So bell rings and my class leave but im asleep and didnt know and no one woke me up. So i wake up in middle of 6B and realize i missed the bell. So get up looking like a dumb ass and all the seniors staring at me and i walk to lunch and look like a retard cuz my table could tell i slept through the period.

in 1st grade i was playing kickball and it was 2 outs and some dumb ass was up 2 kick and i knew he was gunna get out. so when they pitched the ball i ran in front of him and destroyed the ball. but it went down this hill and in the street and was gone!! then we got back in the class room and my teacher was screaming at me and just putting me down and i started crying. embarrassing.

Feedback: http://hypebeast.com/forums/buyerseller-feedback/172003


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