Can you check this out too since you the only one providing feedback lol.
I come in at 2:09
You are way better then that first dude, he was almost unbearable to listen too. I get a ofwgkta vibe from you in some respect. I think you have potential. I think the way you deliver your bars, voice and delivery is good. I just think the raps fall on and off beat a little. In reality shit like that just comes with practice, or just reading your lyrics over and over and over and over until you know them by heart and don't even need a paper to spit your verse.